BTS Eighth Member | The Life: Year 2014

Chapter 17- American Hustle Life: Unapologetic

May 4th, 2014:

Yesterday had been the most relaxed day we'd had since arriving in the U.S. The boys that had won the cooking mission went shopping with Coolio in the morning and when they came back Coolio gave his final message before leaving the show. I had come back to the residence at around noon with my hand in a splint and the other one bandaged. The doctors said that I had a boxer's fracture in my right hand, which probably came from my last punch on the wall. They said it would take roughly a month to heal which meant I had to spend a month with my hand dominant hand in a splint. Out of all the boys, Yoongi was probably the most worried. He kept apologizing and saying it was his fault and that he shouldn't have left me alone. It broke my heart to see him beating himself up over something I did.

I had calmed down significantly throughout the night, but inside I was still broken by how things never seemed to go my way or how people said they would. This decision had truly started to make me doubt everything in this world, and whether all the promises made by people, governments, and institutions could ever be trusted. But I had to stop my pity party and go back to being the professional I was being paid to be.

I got back after Coolio's goodbye, but apparently, he had said to tell me that he was impressed with my passion and liked my tenacity. Even though my first impressions of Coolio weren't great, throughout his mentorship, I had started to respect him. He knew what he was doing and you just had to prove yourself to him and I respected that.

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We were all lined up in front of our new mentor, Jenny Kita. Our new mission was based on dancing and boy was I not excited about it. However, Jenny was a seasoned dancer and a very good teacher and person overall. It was nice to also have another female finally in the room.

She had asked us to each dance individually so she could assess our talent. I did my best, but couldn't give in to my coping mechanism when in embarrassing situations, which was to just lean into it and become comical. It made people laugh, and on a show like this, was what was needed, so it all worked out in the end.

She then had us all line up with our backs to her. She took our best dancers: Jungkook, Jimin, and Hoseok, out of the line. She then put Seokjin with Hoseok, Namjoon with Jimin, and Suga with Jungkook.

"I'm going to put you two," she says taking me to join Taehyung, "together since you're maybe not the best in the group, but your both solid, and I think it will make an interesting team".

"Ok, so these will be your teams!" she claps, happy with her work. She then started going through every member and what they could do to improve their dancing. She also suggested a few things for every group to focus on as a team.

"Now you two," she says looking towards Taehyung and me at the end of the line.

"V, you're a solid dancer. You have the body control; you just haven't fully mastered it yet. You also need to develop the creative aspect of your dancing, but with more practice, I can definitely see you becoming a very good dancer," she explains to Taehyung who thanks her and bows.

"Y/N, you're kind of similar. I see a lot of potential. I can tell you could possibly have really good body potential and awareness, you just haven't completely harnessed control of your body yet. You also just need to get more confident; dancing is all about confidence. If you have confidence, the dance will come more naturally," she says to me.