Mistress

8

I quickly discovered that my worries were totally useless. Ignatius treated me like a friend since we met at the airport. Roman also started to like me. Only Dashiell seemed a little bit confused about me. I thought that he saw through our lies, and knows that I'm someone more than a driver.

To be honest, me and Cate haven't had sex since her kids arrived, but I'm totally fine with that. Seeing her so happy around them is so cute. I love spending my time with them.

Today I had my day off. Honestly when I came back to my empty flat I felt sad and lonely. I cleaned a little, and I found old cooking book. I tried to make muffins but I failed. I was really bored. I thought about calling Cate, but I stopped myself. She needs some time with her children. I started to think about all this cute or funny moments with them. What she was like when she was married? Were they happy with Andrew? And why they divorced?

I got interrupted in my thoughts because my phone rang.

Y/N, thank God. I need your help. You see, I totally forgot that I have a meeting today. It's so fucking important and I forgot about it.

Ok, I'll drive you there, no problem.

Thank you, but you see there's one small problem. Dashiell and Roman have something planned so they won't be home either way, but I don't have anyone to leave Ignatius with.

Ok, I'll look after him.

Thank you so much. You're life saviour Y/N. I love you, bye!

She ended the call, but I just sat there and stared at my wall. I love you. She said that cause she meant it or just was happy?

Anyway I got ready and picked them up. When Cate left for her meeting, she said that it'll take hours so we have a lot of time. Today was very sunny and hot day, so I thought about taking Ignatius to the swimming pool. Of course I asked Cate for permission earlier, and she agreed.

So, now we were currently waiting to but tickets. I was surprised by how excited the little boy was.

You don't go out often with your dad?

Nooo, he always says that he don't have time. We have a nanny but she's not as cool as u.

I smiled and picked him up, so he could see more.

When I layed for the tickets we headed to the changing rooms. I stopped and stared at the door.

Y/N why aren't ya coming?

Shit. I have to come with him and help him put on his suit. But I also need to change. How would I explain what gender I am. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

The little boy gra bed my hand and tried to push me. It was cute, so I let him. When I helped him with his suit, I quickly changeg into mine. When I finished he was staring at me. Fuck.

Kid, it's complicated. You'll understand when you're be older...

Huh? I don't understand you now.

Oh, that's ok I suppose.

I grabbed his hand and walked out.

So do you want me to call you a girl or a boy?

I smiled. Kids are sometimes smarter than adults. They just see the person, not their gender or orientation.

I prefer she. But if you call me a boy I wouldn't mind.

He just nodded, and soon was too busy with playing in the water. After I finally conficed him to go home, we arrived at my flat. I washed his hair and dried it. His aim was to escape me, and eat pizza that I ordered. After I cleaned my bathroom I gave him his part of the pizza. When we finished eating, he decided to look around. He found my collection of old CDs.

A few hours passed and Cate still was at her meeting. Ignatius didn't look tired, so I took him to the playground. It was empty at this time of the day, so we played in hide and seek. Then, he conviced me to swing him. While I was doing so, he laughed and shouted higher. I felt so happy. I wondered how it would feel if I had my own kid. Would I be a good parent? No, first I' d have to found someone to have that kid with. Because I doubt that they'd let me adopt, when they can't even clarify if I'd be a father or a mother. I came back to reality when I heard a scream. I looked around panicking. I spotted Ignatius laying on the ground and crying. Shit. I swung him too high. What I'll tell Cate? She'd fire me.
I tried to calm him down and asked what exacly happened to him. It seemed that he hurt his knees, but I was afraid that swing could hit him in the head. I took him to the hospital and called Cate.

She arrived when I was sitting in the hall. They didn't want to let me see him because I wasn't his parent.

I stood up and wanted to explain her what happened but she just passed me and walked to the doctor.

After she came back to the hall, she finally spotted me.

C-cate I'm so sorry. It's all my fault, please don't hate me...

She looked at me at first angry but when she saw my state her expression softened.

Shhh, calm down. I don't blame you.

She hugged me. I felt even worse. It was her kid that got hurt. I should comfort her, not in the other way.

I-it was an accident, I swear.

I said choking on my own tears.

I'm terrible person. So selfisch... I shouldn't think about myself so much.

She motioned me to sit down, and started to massage my back. Suddenly I felt very tired.

Cate.

Yes?

I-i love you.

After that I sink into the darkness.

1000 words yay. Thanks for reading ❤️