Daughter of Mina & Delia - (Sarah Paulson fanfic)

DEGENERATION

TW : Panic Attack, Fainting, Self-Harm, Anxiety

Hazel's POV :

When I reopened my eyes, all I could see was the floor and mom's Mina lap. Then I heard mom Delia shushing sweet nothings to me, with a broken voice, like she was crying. "You're okay baby girl, you're fine we're here, with you, just the three of us."

"Mom ?" I asked in a raspy voice.

"Yes sweetie, we're here it's us. Are you back with us ?" Answered mom Mina.

"Mom wh- what happened ?" I demanded anxiously, as I couldn't move my body.

"I think you had a flashback, and you started hurting yourself so we had to... to restrain you baby. Do you think you're okay now and we can release you ?" Responded mom Mina, hesitant.

"I- I think mom..." I said unsure.

Moms exchanged a worry look and they slowly released my aching body. I moved a little but my body was painful, I must have been so tense during my attack. I finally sat on the floor, looking at my red skin. Moms seemed sad and worried at the same time, but they let me the time to adjust myself and learn about my surroundings. I took a shaky breathe and looked at them. Mom Mina had a sad smile on her face and Mom Delia was wiping a few tears on her cheeks.

"How are you feeling honey ?" Asked mom Mina.

"I think I'm okay... I- I don't know what happened I can't recall how I ended up like this.."

Mom Mina sighed. "I yelled too loudly and you fell to the ground, screaming and scratching your skin. That's why you're bleeding. Can you stand up so that we can clean your wounds lovely ?"

I nodded and slowly stood up as mom Mina had her hand around my waist to help me. She made sit on the couch and mom Delia entered the room with a first aid kit. While she was cleaning my skin, she tried to explain why they shouted at me.

"Hazel, I don't know if you remember but we were angry at you because you skipped classes today, and we were so worried because we had no news from you, while you were supposed to be at school..."

Suddenly everything came back to me. The bullying, the mean teacher and the woman from the office. I realized that they misunderstood the situation because I had no time to explain myself, and I started breathing heavily again at the thought of them being mad at me for my bad behavior of today, even if I knew deep down it wasn't my fault and I did nothing wrong. It was just my anxiety.

"Sweetheart are you okay ?" Asked mom Delia. She put her hand on my knee to inform me from her presence because she was scared I would go into a new flashback.

"I- I'm so sorry moms... I tried I swear but- but they were so mean to me and- and I couldn't go back becau- because they would laugh at me and call me names and- and I was sc- scared but I promise I- I tried and..." I stopped because I couldn't breathe.

"Slowly my love, deep breathe." Mom Delia reassured me as mom Mina was stroking my back up and down in order to calm me down.

"Breathe for my Hazel, In... And out... Just like that, you're doing so good. In... and out."

"I- I don't feel good mom... dizzy..." I whimpered and everything went black.

Cordelia's POV :

Hazel was having a panic attack when her eyes fluttered close and she passed out. We laid her down on the couch and while we were waiting for her to wake up, I told my wife about what I saw on her wrist.

"Darling, I noticed something before, when she was having the flashback." I took her hand in mine and lifted her sleeve. "Look, I think she cut herself."

Mina's eyes went wide and she took Hazel's wrist in her hand, gently caressing the cuts.

"You say she self harms ?" She asked panicking.

"It looks like so..." And our daughter's eyes started to open.

"Sweetie can you hear me ? Can you squeeze my hand ?" Demanded Mina to Hazel.

She seemed so vulnerable and it broke my heart. I saw her squeezing my wife's hand and I felt relieved.

"Wh- why am I l- like that ?" She asked, tears slowly making their way down her face.

"Shhhhhh precious love, don't speak. Just breathe and let your moms take care of you." I murmured to her. She nodded and sobbed quietly as I was healing her last marks on her body, but I didn't want to touch her cuts for now, because I knew I would have to talk to her about that, and I couldn't bare to see my girl panicking or worst, fainting in front of us again.