Beyond Saturation

E

23 July 2016

Jimin
Guess who finally got whatsaapppp 😍😍

Taehyung chuckled but regretted it right away because of the pain that ran up the nerves of his face. Still, he winced and replied to Jimin. 

Taehyung
Hi Jimin 😊
I'm glad you finally got whatsapp
How are you?

Jimin
I'm fine.
We came back home yesterday.
How are you, hyung?

The reply was almost immediate. It made Taehyung realize that it was best if he sat up for the chat that was going to follow. It wasn't too comfortable to chat in a sleeping position with all of his body parts being sore. 

With difficulty, he sat up and threw a look at his husband, who was sleeping peacefully next to him after putting him in such a state. 

The memory of the previous night still sent chills down his spine. That rage in Jeongguk's eyes, that animosity in his actions, that cruelty in his words, everything sent chills down Taehyung's spine.

In a nutshell, Jeongguk had been furious that Taehyung had made him look like a bad man with his actions on the day after the funeral. He had made him appear to be a heartless person by leaving to Daegu after what happened. Especially when they still had their relatives in their house. 

All in all, Taehyung realized that Jeongguk wasn't sorry for what happened that day. Instead, he realized that Taehyung wouldn't resist coming back if he apologized, and used it to his advantage to get him back home. 

And it killed Taehyung from the inside. 

Just why was he so easy?

Sighing, he decided to answer Jimin instead of getting into the vicious bog of his thoughts. 

Taehyung
I'm...|

Taehyung so desperately wanted to lie and say he was fine, but his fingers just wouldn't type the word no matter how hard he tried. Instead, tears formed in his eyes when he tried to force himself to type 'fine'. 

He wondered what was wrong with him. He was generally good at masking his emotions while texting someone. It was impossible for anyone to find out his true emotions while talking to him through texts. So why was it suddenly so hard?

'Fuck it,' he thought,'I don't care anymore.'

Taehyung
I'll be fine 😊

Jimin
Is something wrong?
Did Jeongguk hyung do something again?
Did you come back to Seoul?

Taehyung
Everything is fine now, Jimin, don't worry.
And no, your hyung didn't do anything.
I need to go and cook breakfast now, let's talk later.
Bye 😊

With that, he pocketed his phone and got off the bed without waiting for Jimin's reply. It took a lot of effort for him to actually get to the bathroom, but he somehow managed it and sighed when hot water gushed out of the shower and relaxed his sore muscles a little. 

However, it also affected his strong resolve to not cry over the previous night's matter. With the water flowing down his face and relaxing his face muscles, he crouched down and hid his face in his hands just as the first sob tore out. 

It took some time for him to pull himself together and leave the shower, but the damage was done already, he supposed, when he found Jeongguk sitting up on the bed and glaring at him.

Maybe he heard him cry inside. 

"I don't see any boobs on you," Jeongguk said. 

Taehyung frowned. He didn't know what to make of that sentence. He just decided to wait a couple of seconds more. Jeongguk himself would complete whatever he was trying to say. 

"I didn't know you became a girl. Aren't you ashamed to be crying like a bitch?" Jeongguk gathered his spit with a disgusted expression and spat in Taehyung's direction. 

Before Taehyung could reply, he got off the bed and walked to the bathroom. "Clean that by the time I come out," he said and shoved Taehyung away from the bathroom's entrance, making him scramble for something to hold on to. 

Taehyung nodded stiffly after Jeongguk slammed the bathroom door shut. "Okay," he mumbled to himself and went to the closet to dress up before cleaning Jeongguk's spit. 

'At least he didn't spit directly on me,' he comforted himself. 

That was how he coped lately. Thinking of worse situations helped him comfort himself. He thought he was lucky to not have faced those worse situations instead. 

He knew it was pathetic, but something was better than nothing. At the moment, he craved some comfort and this type of thinking helped. 

He thought of his brother and brother-in-law. He thought of how they were always there for each other. Why couldn't he have such a husband? What wrong had he done to deserve this?!

"What is this? You are still not done? Good for nothing bull," he heard Jeongguk say from behind him and before he could even turn around to face him, he felt a foot crash into his back, sending him down to the ground. 

Memories of the previous night flooded his mind and made him unable to move and protect himself. He wished it wouldn't repeat. He didn't know if his body would be able to take another beating. 

It seemed as if now that Jeongguk had freely hit him last night, he wasn't holding back anymore because according to Taehyung, he had done nothing at the moment to deserve a kick. 

Yet, he did receive one. 

"I-I-I'm d-done, s-seoba-seobang-seobang-nim," he stuttered heavily in fear, cursing internally for stuttering when he knew Jeongguk didn't like it when he stuttered. "Retard," Jeongguk mumbled and rolled his eyes, walking away from the room. 

Taehyung scrambled to throw the tissue in the dustbin in the bathroom. His sore body protested heavily, but he didn't pay attention to it. He had to hurry and cook breakfast if he wanted to avoid more problems for the day. He was late already. 

He mindlessly stepped on the foot pedal of the dustbin and almost turned around to rush downstairs when something white caught his attention inside it. 

Something that he recognized almost immediately. 

Something that shouldn't have been there in his house. 

A pregnancy test strip.

One that clearly showed that the user was pregnant.