You're a Badger, Harry

14: You Need to Find Snape's Button, Harry

Sources of references in chapter: "Potter Puppet Pals: Snape's Diary" on YouTube along with others from the same series, and the totally awesome AVPM trilogy.

Summary: Harry and Snape make an okay team.

Snape, Snape, Severus Snape... was having a very bad day. First off, his oatmeal had been very watery and bland that morning. Secondly, Remus Lupin had walked into the Great Hall and smiled at Severus like they were acquaintances (which they most certainly were not, especially after that D.A.D.A. lesson with the boggart). Then, during lunch, a misaimed prank from the Weasley twins had Severus smelling like broccoli.

But it wasn't any of that that made this day bleaker than normal, although they certainly didn't help. No, it was the disappearance of a button on his favorite cloak. He searched far and wide — or as far and wide as he could with the dementors prowling about.

Eventually, Severus admitted defeat and paid tribute to his beloved button that night by writing a poem.

Button, oh, button, oh, where hath though fled?
Did thee tarry too long amongst fabric and thread?
Did thee roll off my bossom and cease to exist?
How I wish I could follow thee into the mist

The next day, Severus trudged out of his quarters, passing a prefect in the common room telling the students not to lose them any points for the day or else. Then he entered the Great Hall and slumped in a seat.

"What's wrong, Severus?" asked McGonagall.

"Everything," said Severus, scowling into his oatmeal, which was thankfully not watery and bland this time.

"Anything bothering you in particular?" McGonagall pressed.

"I lost a button on my cloak."

"Oh, dear." McGonagall patted his arm. "I'm sorry to hear that. Have you tried the Summoning Charm?"

Severus scowled at her. "Do I look like an idiot? Of course I did."

"Had to make sure," she said, unperturbed. "You know, Severus, you could always ask Mr. Potter to help you."

She did not just suggest that.

"Or you can wallow in misery," said McGonagall when Severus remained silent, turning back to her breakfast.

Severus pretended he hadn't heard her. He just scowled at the Potter brat, who was sitting with the Gryffindors today. His orange friend sat next to him telling him something exciting.

Ask Mr. Potter to help... Ha! No.

Twenty minutes later, Severus was trying to locate Potter and his friends. He found them in the courtyard chatting about.

"Potter," he growled out, already hating himself for this.

"Polo." Potter slurped on that stupid straw of his. "Am I in trouble?"

"Not today." Severus braced himself. "I may... require your... assistance for something."

Potter choked. His orange friend thumped him on the back while the Granger girl stared wide-eyed.

"What do you need help with, sir?" Draco asked politely.

"I'm looking for a button that had fallen off my cloak. I noticed its absence yesterday and McGonagall suggested I ask Potter since he's a Hufflepuff."

"What the hell...?" Potter shrugged. "Eh, why not? I'll see you guys later."

"See you," said Draco.

"I hope you find your button, Snape," said Potter's orange friend, looking up into Severus' eyes solemnly.

Severus found himself believing him. "So do I, orange one," he murmured, vision blurring slightly. "So. Do. I."

He and Potter started off back inside.

"Okay." Potter rubbed his hands together. "Let's start off by retracing your steps. Where have you gone in the past two days?"

"My office, my potions lab, and the Great Hall," Severus answered. He wasn't one to go wandering the halls much.

Potter nodded as though he'd expected that. "Let's start with the Astronomy Tower."

Severus did not bother to question this, though he was confused.

The button was not at the Astronomy Tower, though a very confused Professor Sinistra told them that she thought she heard Peeves singing about something he found. So the unlikely duo went to find the poltergeist. That was... probably not their best decision.

"Anywhere else?" a soaked Severus snapped.

An equally soaked Potter rubbed his chin. "Aha!" He took off running, ignoring Severus deducting points from Hufflepuff and forcing him to run after him.

To Severus' confusion, Potter seemed to be heading for the staffroom. Still nothing.

"Forget it, Potter," Severus grumbled. "The button is lost. It will never be found again."

Potter glared at him. "Are you a Slytherin or not? Don't give up so easily." He closed his eyes raised his hand in front of him, swaying it back and forth.

"What in the world are you doing?"

"Channeling my inner Hufflepuff," Potter answered, eyes still shut.

Severus was debating whether or not he should sneak off when Potter's eyes flew open. "Ya-ha! Come on, Professor!"

He took off again, and Severus followed, cursing under his breath.

Professor Flitwick was walking down a corridor. Potter zoomed past. "Five points from Hufflepuff, Mr. Potter," he said distractedly.

Severus was next.

"Five points from Slytherin, Mr. Snape." He paused and frowned. "Wait..." He shrugged and continued on.

Severus ignored him, too busy trying to keep up to Potter without passing out to register his words.

They finally reached an unused classroom.

"Potter, you better have a good reason as to why you've dragged me to this wretched —"

"Tada!"

Severus stared. In Potter's hand was the missing button. "How did you...?"

"I'm a Hufflepuff, remember?" Potter said, dropping it in Severus' hand.

"What the hell...?" Severus trailed off, gazing at the button as though it would disappear if he looked away.

A slurping sound snapped him from his daze. "Thank you," he managed to get out.

To Potter's credit, he didn't make a big deal out of it. "You're welcome," he said around his straw. "Now maybe you can stop hating me and bullying Neville Longbottom for no legitimate reason."

"I suppose I have been a bit harsh on him," Severus conceded. "But you are still a menace."

Potter shrugged. "I'll take it!" He gave a salute and skipped off.

Severus watched him go, then glanced down at the button in his hand. Well. This had certainly been an interesting day.

He headed back to his office. He had just reached the door when he saw the prefect from that morning marching to the center of the common room and calling for everyone's attention.

"All right, which one of you dunderheads is responsible for us going down five points after my lecture earlier?" he asked, steely gaze sweeping over the students.

Severus quietly slid into his office.

Oooh, Sevvie's in trouble — if he gets caught, that is.