I Needed You

21

"I didn't mean it, I didn't mean to," I sat up in the bed, mumbling the same words I had been saying since I got home from the police station.

I didn't want to rethink what happened on that day, two days ago. I hated that I had been considered a criminal, that I upset the poor lady for breaking her tea set.

The tea set that looked so much like the one I had back home.

I brought my knees to my chest, letting my aching heart voice itself as I hid my face. I knew nobody could hear me, being that it was in the middle of the night and everyone went to sleep hours ago.

All I wanted was for my father to hold me, like he did when I was a little girl. Tell me that everything is okay and that this is all just a nightmare, and I need to wake up.

But this is my reality. I have to make do.

I sniffled, lifting my head and pulling the blankets off my lap. With a sigh I slid myself off the bed, being as silent as my feet would let me as I walked to my bedroom door.

The house was dark, with green neon lights lining the arcade being the only source of light between my room and the kitchen. I quickly walked into the kitchen, my fear of the dark noticeably returning.

"Oop, sorry," I whispered as I felt myself bump into something, a cold figure that seemed to stop me in my place.

There was no response, but I heard Colby's voice echo from the kitchen, "Did you say something?"

"Um," I shook my head, letting out a relieved chuckle when whatever that was went away, "I thought you were asleep,"

I poked my head into the kitchen before my body followed, reaching for the water bottle I tended to keep on the counter. Colby was drinking who knows what out of a red solo cup, shirtless and in shorts.

I focused on my drink instead of watching him as he moved, simply because I didn't want to be caught staring at him.

"Can't sleep," He shrugged as I set the water down, "What about you?"

I swallowed, unsure of whether or not to voice my honest reasoning to him, "I had a dream about my dad," I was careful not to give too many details simply out of fear or boring him.

"You miss him a lot, huh?" Colby gave a half smile that was stitched with sympathy.  I found myself annoyed with that, being it was the only look I ever got when people looked at me anymore.

"Every day," I swallowed once again, this time to get the lump out of my throat, "I just wish I could take all of this back and spend every second with him,"

"You know it might sound selfish and kind of like a dick move but I'm happy you didn't," Colby walked closer to me, probably to keep our voices from getting louder as we got deeper into the conversation.

"What makes you say that?" I couldn't help but giggle lightly at him, and though I assumed I knew the answer, I just wanted to hear it out of his mouth.

"Because of you never came to LA than we would have never met. And I'm happy we met.  Even now, even though I'm unsure of what this is," Colby motioned back and forth between us, "I know I'm grateful for every minute of it,"

I knew I'd consider his words more later, but for now I brushed them off.

"Huh," I chewed the inside of my cheek as he fell quiet, and I noticed that it was on me to change the subject, "What about you? Why can't you sleep?"

"I have a lot on my mind," He shrugged, "I honestly don't think I'll be able to fall back asleep,"

"Neither do I," I left out the fact that I had issues with sleeping simply because I didn't need another thing for him to worry about.