I Needed You

31

Taylor's pov

It was hours before any doctor came back with news on Colby.

The lady at the reception desk suggested that we go to sleep, being that it was six in the morning and our faces were ridden with exhaustion.

Everyone except for Sam and I ended up dozing off, Amanda's head on my shoulder while Kat's was on Sam's and Stas's body leaning on her pink haired friend.

I held on to myself, the only thing that felt right.

I wanted to go back, I wanted to tell my past self that we really shouldn't have gone into the basement.

And I wanted to go home.  I wanted to go with everyone back to LA and pretend this never happened.

"Did Colby ever tell you," Sam whispered, causing my head to turn in his direction, "The time he woke up in the pool?"

"What?" I asked with a disbelieving chuckle, "No, he didn't,"

I could tell that Sam was just trying to lighten the mood, but any distraction was good.

"Yeah.  Corey and I dragged him in for a prank," Sam smiled, and it was as if I could picture it.

Colby, fast asleep who knows where, and Sam getting the mischievous idea to throw his best friend in the pool.

"He was sick so he took some medicine to knock him out," Sam continued, "and I blew up a pool floatie that Corey helped me put him on,"

"He was sick?!" I was completely shocked by these boys behavior, though it was pretty funny, "Poor Colby,"

Even though this probably happened years ago, I felt bad that Colby had to go through that.

But better him than me, I suppose.

"Tell me something else.  Oh," I paused, getting hesitant as I asked a question I actually wanted an answer to, "Tell me about Meghan,"

"Meghan?" Sam asked, his eyebrows furrowing as he looked at me again.

He didn't question the topic, thankfully.  Instead, he cleared his throat, "Well, what do you want to know?"

"I want to know everything," I let out a breath, "How did they meet?"

It took Sam a couple of minutes to answer.  It was as if he didn't know exactly how they met, or he just forgot.

"Taylor was a friend of Kat's from Canada,  but they only started hanging out after they met at her job at some pizza shop," He began, "Colby and Jake were there getting something to eat when a shooting began.  I don't know exactly the details about it, but she got them both out of there.  And it just kind of went from there,"

"Oh wow,"  It sounded almost like a fairytale to my weary mind, "If only I could save his life, or hers, now,"

"Taylor," Sam gave me one long look from his pale blue eyes, "You saved him. Over and over again.  Maybe not in a literal sense, like Meghan, but maybe something better,"

"I-" I went to speak but stopped myself, "If I saved him like you say I did then why do I feel like I know nothing?" 

I could swear to God that they did not meet in a pizza shop.  I knew I had been told how they met.

But maybe Colby didn't consider that really meeting her, only that he was grateful because she saved his life.

"Everyone has secrets," Sam sighed, "Including the ones that no one will ever share. It's just a part of life,"

"It's unfair," I pouted, being dramatic due to the waves of exhaustion hitting me like very strong waves.

I turned, leaning over Amanda and gripping Sam's arm.

"Sam I can't lose Colby," I felt my face wrinkle up as I fought the tears that were balancing on my eyelashes, "He's all I have left.  If he dies I can't... I'd die.  I'd never recover and I'd blame myself forever

"It would hurt every time I tried to breath and I would lose my appetite when I'd eat something he liked.  Fuck, I couldn't even drink alcohol without the looming thought that he should be standing beside me and enjoying it too,"

Sam seemed to let his own wall break down now, gently resting Kat on Stas and standing up, pulling my hand up with him.

It felt good to be held by him, to know that someone else sympathized with the broken heart I was going to have.

"I will never know, never imagine what it's like to lose Colby.  I would miss him, knowing that I'm where I am today because of him and we've been together every day for six years," Sam sighed, letting his chin come to rest on my hand.

"But I will never begin to understand the feeling of losing the love of your life, at least not for some time,"  I knew he was referring to Kat, who he'd known since he moved to LA all those years ago.

"I'm here for you Taylor," He rubbed his hand in slow circles on my back, "But let's not give up, okay?"

"Sam," I didn't realize how bad I was crying until my voice gave it away, "You are a good fucking friend.  Colby is so lucky to have someone like you,"

"I-" Sam went to speak again when we heard footsteps come from down the hall.

"Mr. Golbach?" We looked to see Doctor Stewart making her way towards us.

"Hey, do you have news for us?" Sam pulled away from me slowly, clasping his hands together as Kat stirred, her eyes blinking open.

"Please sit down," She told the both of us gently, and one look in her eyes said everything it needed to.

Colby wasn't doing okay.

I shook Amanda's leg with one hand, holding myself with the other.

"Please tell me it's just a concussion," Stas folded her hands together as she pleaded with the woman.

"I wish that's all it was," Doctor Stewart admitted, "But the CT scans show that Cole has Cerebral Edema,"

"What's that?" Kat asked, her Canadian accent thick as he fingers linked with Sam's.

"It's where the brain swells, putting pressure on his skull and causing fluid to fill his brain," Her arms stayed behind her back as she spoke, "Normally these aren't caused by trauma, but it seemed that he must have had it before tonight,"

"What's that mean?" I felt my throat begin to become sore as the tear flow didn't stop, "It's treatable, right? Just drain his brain?"

I was desperate for an answer, desperate for something.

"I'm afraid not.  He's body is in a coma right now, and hopefully he wakes up before he," the doctor thought for a moment, considering her words, "Passes on,"

"He's going to die?" I felt my knees become weak as I looked at Sam, hoping that this was all some wicked dream.

The sorrow in his eyes, in Kat's, in Stas's and Amanda's proved to me that I was not imagining her words.

The man, the sweet man I loved, though the word love scared me at the thought, was not going to survive.

"No," My whispers got louder as I covered my face in my hands, "No no no."