Dollhouse [Rabastan Lestrange]

Chapter 14

"Maybe January's light
will consume
my entire heart in it's cruel rays."

The flames grew as the scrunched up letter hit them, before settling back down into a low glow that illuminated the Slytherin Common Room. Callista crossed her arms, holding them tight against her body.

Mrs Greengrass had sent another letter urging her to cosy up to Rabastan. Her mother claimed that it would be embarrassing for the family if the connection they tried so hard to secure was ruined because Callista would not grow up.

"Grow up?" Callista muttered to herself. She has done countless things for the good of her family and they thought she was being childish because she did not want to be controlled?

She glanced at the common room door. The students would be returning soon. She looked back to the fire, making sure that the letter had turned to ash before she left.

Some of the portraits watched her pass, most keeping to themselves. She said hello to a few of them, but other than that her walk went uninterrupted.

She approached a turn and gazed down both corridors. They were empty. She turned left and was met with a set of spiralling stairs. Looking behind her once more, she began to walk up the stairs.

Once reaching the top she pushed open the large door the stood before her. She slipped inside the Astronomy Tower and shut the door behind her. Here she could be alone.

She walked to the front of the tower. The sun was beginning to sink lower in the sky, casting its cold rays onto the earth. She breathed in. The Scotland mountains rolled steadily into the distance that surrounded Hogwarts. The trees stood tall above the snow-covered ground, edging carefully around the Black Lake. The sight was calming. The enormity of it all. She breathed out.

Between her parents forcing her into a marriage she is still not sure she wants, her brother and sister's safety, and her father's infidelity, she did not know which would break her first.

She hated it all. Some days she wished she had never been born into this family. She always stopped that train of thought. Who would take all the family burdens if it was not her? Freya? Stellan? They would have to suffer it all, at least she could soften it. She could be married to a respectable family. She would take the Dark Mark if it meant her siblings did not have to. She would keep the family's secrets if it meant they did not have to carry the weight of them.

She would carry the world even if it destroyed her.

It was. It was destroying her. She did not want any of this. It was her duty. She wanted to be free. Freedom was a child's dream. The two parts of her fought back and forth and it was destroying her.

She did not know when the first tear fell, but she did not stop it. She let them fall. She allowed herself this moment to break away from her strict life to just cry.

She scrunched up her fists and slid to the floor. She leaned her head against the railing, watching the shadow that her body cast onto the floor of the Astronomy Tower. She let the tears fall free.

For a while Callista was in her own world. Then, the moment shattered.

The door was pushed open and she drew herself up off the floor, turning her back to the door. She dried her tears, not wanting to know who had disturbed her.

"Callista?" A familiar voice called. Rabastan. She did not answer. His footsteps drew closer until he was standing next to her. "What's wrong?"

She contemplates telling him, and decides on doing it. He is going to be her husband after all and is that not something married couples do? Tell each other things?

"I can't take it anymore."

He stayed silent.

"This family, this life. It's all so much."

He sighed. "I know, but it's the life we're born into and it's the life we have to live."

"I don't know if I can." Her world was teetering on a precarious edge, demanding she do something. Fall or scramble to safety. It did not tell her that choosing safety would lead her into the jaws of another danger. Fall or scramble. Her body was demanding she fall.

Rabastan put his hands on the railing, almost touching her own. "You," he began. "You have to. You have to be strong because no one else will do it for you." His words became firmer. "You cannot let them see you break, it only fuels them. You have to be strong."

She looked at him for the first time since he entered, not caring about her tear-stained face or blotchy skin. "You know what makes it worse? I have an out. I can get out but at the same time I can't. I can't leave my siblings and it would destroy my parents."

"You cannot let them take everything from you. You still have your strength and your resilience, and you cannot let anyone take that from you." He looked out over the grounds. The sun was setting, casting an orange glow over their faces. "It's the only way you'll survive."

Callista thought about what he said. He was right. She was losing herself and she could not let that happen. Her parents may have forced her into this marriage, into this life, but she would take control of it. She would protect her siblings and take back control.

"Thank you," she whispered. She turned her gaze to the sunset. They stood in silence and she wondered what the future held for them. They were not so different. Both grew up in similar situations and both were told what to do and when to do it. They were both forced to be strong or be eaten alive.

She looked at the man that would someday be her husband with a newfound hope. Hope that they could one day be happy together, possibly in love. If not, at the very least, good friends.

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