An Angel's smile//Drarry

VII

I still couldn't comprehend the fact that Draco Malfoy had been bleeding pretty badly, his friend didn't know what to do with it, and that I, his worst rival, took care of him. Why was he bleeding? How'd he do that? I must confess I was very curious as to how he hurt himself and if it was accidental. It didn't look accidental. I'd know because I was pretty familiar with pain. Too familiar.

I tried to shrug it off, what did I care? He was a death eater, a jerk, and a murderer. I shouldn't care about him or anything he does.

I met with Ron and Hermione after classes in the Great Hall. I used my fork to play around with my food. I was hungry, I could feel my stomach grumbling, but I didn't feel like eating. I could sense Ron and Hermione exchanging worried looks, but I ignored them. People really had to stop thinking I was some oblivious dumb boy when I really wasn't. It was just easier to pretend I was. "Harry...you should eat.", Hermione said, placing a hand on my shoulder. I nodded, stuffing the tasteless food into my mouth until my plate was empty. Then, I left without a word. I strolled along the corridors without purpose, staring at my feet walking without end until for some reason I was standing in front of a door. I looked up, my feet had brought me back to the girl's lavatory on the first floor. I went in, placed the brick aside, and opened the diary.

I guess I understand why you won't reveal your identity, I get that it's scary. I'm scared. Scared of people knowing who I was because it would make it even harder for them to understand what I'm going through. I'm not okay. I've done so many bad things, I feel like everything is my fault, and maybe it actually is? I eat, but the food always decides to be vomited out, it's like my own body wants me to die. The pain. The pain helps. I don't want to hurt myself, but I can't stop. It's like I'm addicted to wanting the worst for myself. I just want this to be over. Any advice?

This person was doing badly. Perhaps even worse than me. What kind of bad things could they possibly have done if the war was all my fault, not theirs. Whoever it is, they need help. I could try to be that help? God, I was curious. I needed to know who this was. I needed to give them a hug. I wrote down some advice, I wasn't sure if it was really so great, but as long as it could help them, I'd be happy. I left the lavatory after and walked towards my dorm. On my way back, I ran into Malfoy and Zabini who seemed to be fighting. They hadn't noticed me, so I hid behind a pillar.

"I can't keep doing this Draco! You're sick in the head, and I can't handle this!", Zabini yelled, throwing his hands in the air in defense. "You're supposed to be my friend, Blaise! Friends help each other!", Malfoy yelled back, his fists clenched together. He looked as if he could hit his fellow Slytherin at any moment, but he looked too fragile to create any damage. Zabini scoffed, "When are you going to realize I don't want to be your fucking friend Draco! I want to be way more! You don't even let me in, who am I kidding? We're barely even friends!", he scowled, turning around. His jaw was clenched and he was rubbing his neck with his hand. "Don't start, Blaise. Please don't.", Malfoy mumbled. He was barely audible from where I was standing. Then Blaise said something I wasn't able to understand and left. I waited for a few seconds as Malfoy was kneeling on the ground, his hands on his head and his face in his legs, he just stayed there, still.

"Malfoy? Are you okay?", I asked, walking towards him. He immediately looked up, stood up, and pushed me. "Get the fuck away from me! I don't need your help!", he yelled, running away from me. I don't think he was okay. I felt kind of offended by the way he ran away like that, but it's understandable I guess. I was his rival, we hated each other, and I'd just listened in on a private conversation, but I was only trying to help him. I was only ever trying to help people. It was so frustrating.

I walked to my dorm where I met Neville taking care of his plants. I quite liked the plants around our shared room, they were very pretty and calm and the air was great, but there were just so many bugs in our room. So. Many. They were driving me mad. They were making it even harder for me to fall asleep. That night, I must've fallen asleep around 5:30 am, I had stayed awake for 6 hours, thoughts about the person from the notes clouding my head. Somewhere amongst those clouds, there was a flash of blonde hair. For some reason, I was worried about Malfoy.

When I woke up that morning, Neville was already gone. I looked at the time, breakfast was ending soon so I dressed myself, then I rushed to the Great Hall. As soon as I sat down, I felt a hand on my shoulder. "Potter, We've been waiting for you. Would you please follow me.", Professor McGonagall said, walking towards her office. Once I arrived there, I could see Neville sitting in front of her desk. I glanced at both of them, but Neville seemed as curious as I was. "So, you both share a room and as you know Draco Malfoy and Blaise Zabini share a room as well. Now Zabini has requested a room change and I imagine you're both happy with your room situation, but unfortunately, you will be exchanging roommates. You can choose between you two with whom you want to share.", she announced. She couldn't possibly be serious? Sharing a room with a Slytherin? Who was I kidding, of course, she was serious. Why would she joke about something as TERRIBLE as this? "I call dibs on Zabini.", Neville mumbled loud enough for us to hear. He looked at me and whispered an apology. I understood why he hadn't wanted to share with Malfoy, he'd gone through a bad experience with him. Worse than me, he never really bullied me because I always bullied him back. "There's no way I'm sharing with Malfoy! Isn't there a way for me to just share a room with Ron and Seamus instead! I'm sure Malfoy can stay alone.", I desperately tried to argue, but with one look McGonagall sent both of us out of her office.

Why was it always me? Malfoy must be gloating right now, planning all different ways to torture me. I scoffed, kicking the wall with my foot. Fuck, that hurts. Instead, I just leaned against the wall with my forehead, it was cold. "Hey Potter.", I heard a familiar voice say. Perfect. "I wanted to apologize for pushing you away yesterday. I was quite upset about an argument I had with Blaise. I don't know if you heard our conversation, but if you did, please keep it to yourself. That includes what you saw in my room with the blood. Anyways, thanks again for helping me with the bandages.", he said. He kept his distance from me. Perhaps he was scared he'd push me again for no reason. "It's fine Malfoy. You really shouldn't get used to me saving you all the time, it's no big deal.", I answered back. I must've had a daft look on my face. I'd honestly never expected him to apologize.

"Sounds more like you're the one that got used to helping me, Potter.", Malfoy smirked, crossing his arms and raising a brow. "Touché.", I said, leaning against the wall with my back. I think I might've smiled at him, if I did it definitely wasn't on purpose, because he smiled back. His smile was so soft and innocent and it looked adorable. It made me want to hug him and whisper sweet things into his ears and just hold him. He looked... he looked like...

Nevermind. I was just tired. I would never want to hold Malfoy, ever. I must've stared at him for a while thinking about that because when I'd regained consciousness, he was very much gone.