Before We Were Us ○ Jasper Hale 2

What Did I Get Myself Into

I look myself over in the mirror, taking a couple deep breaths. This'll be the first day I'm going to school without a hat or something to cover my head.
This'll be the first time I'll walk into school knowing Vampires are real.
This'll be the first time I'll walk into school and completely ignore Bernadette. "A lot of firsts today." I mumble, grabbing my bag and walking out of my house, closing the door and locking it. Walking down the path I freeze, looking up to see a Jeep with Emmett standing in the back.
"Come on! We're giving you a ride!" Emmett yells at me. I nod a little, grabbing a piece of my hair and walking to the car as Jasper jumps out and opens the door for me. I couldn't help smiling as I nod at him and climb into the Jeep, no Alice today. I watch as Jasper slides in next to me and as we drive in silence, he slips his hand into mine, making my smile widen just a little more. "There's so much more I need to know about you." I breathe out, leaning my head back into the car's seat. "Anytime you want, all you have to do is ask." He says in a soothing voice and I nod a little, looking to him as he looks back.
"I don't even know what to ask you." I chuckle as we pull up to the school.
"Oh, how were you, you know... turned." I ask and the atmosphere grows heavy. "We'll give you two a minute." Emmett mumbles before him and Rosalie jump out, turning off the car and leaving us in the car.
"I-If you don't want to, its fine... I shouldn't have asked. I'm sorry." I recoil quickly. I can't loose him too, I can't be alone.
"No, Xanthia... You need to know."he nods, staring into my eyes seriously.
"It's just... You need to know I was a completely different person." He says looking guilty and regretful.
"You don't have to talk about it now." I say quietly but he shakes my head.
"I promised I'd answer if you asked. Just not first thing." He smiles and I nod, looking around and looking over how tense he's gotten, making me nervous. "I-Is it hard for you... to be around me I mean." I ask with my voice shaking but he smiles softly and shakes his head no.
"You... You're so different. Compared to everyone else, I can't smell you... It's easier to be around you, compared to every other human and Vampire or even a Mutt."
"Mutt?" I ask quickly and he nods.
"There's a lot I need to tell you... If possible, may I accompany you home?"
"Home..." I mutter, I guess... I should tell him huh?
"H-Home is... it isn't really a... home. I just kinda... sleep there. And eat there. And my mom... she's not always around but when she is she's drunk. S-So yeah." I warn him and he looks me over. "You've been all alone this whole time?" He asks and I nod a little, playing with the hair at the base of my neck again. "Yeah I guess so." I chuckle awkwardly but he grabs my hand in his, making my façade crumble away.
"It'll be okay, Miss Xanthia... I'm afraid you'll never be alone ever again." He smiles and I smile a little in return before my face turns red.
"W-We should get to class." I mumble and he nods with a smile before I jump out of the car and start walking but I freeze, turning and watching as Jasper exits the car with less enthusiasm. He keeps his eyes locked with mine until he's right next to me.
"Do I help at all?" I ask quietly and we walk side by side. I watch him nod, almost in shame, but I move a little closer to him and stare straight ahead as he looks at me and I clear my throat.
"Th-Then maybe we should be together more. You know... Why risk anything." I reason logically but I could feel his amusement, making me flush in embarrassment. "I am unable to say I appose the offer." He smiles to me and I feel myself turn red, only furthering his own amusement.
"You should sit with us during lunch." A new voice offers, making me jump a little. I look behind me as Edward walks up, saying hello to Jasper and then looking to me. "A-Are you sure? I don't want to impose." I mumble off and he smirks, ruffling my hair and walking off. "Is it really okay?" I look over to Jasper who bumps shoulders with me. "Sticking together, remember?"
"R-Right."

- After School
I wait by Rosalie's Jeep, nervously chewing at my lip. This is the first time someone will be over since... well since him. "Here you are! We thought you'd wait by your locker!!" Alice exclaims and I chuckle awkwardly. I didn't wait there because Bernadette has to pass my locker and I knew she'd say something offensive.
"It's better that she waited here." Edward says, and I look to him confused. "Never mind." He chuckles.
"Jasper's coming now." He says and I look past him to the school and I see a distant Jasper but I had the feeling he was staring into my eyes, making me shiver to the bone.
I keep my eyes locked on him as he does the same until he's standing right in front of me.
"The buses are leaving now, so we should get going." I tell him.
"Bus? What do you mean bus?" Rosalie asks incredulously and I pass Jasper a desperate look. He stands at my side and presses his hand to my lower back, the cold seeping through my cardigan and tank top to the depths of my soul, making me feel oddly warm.
"She wants to take the bus, let her take the bus." Edward chuckles and I look to him again before rushing away with Jasper and getting on the bus that goes silent at the drop of a hat, all eyes trained on the two of us. My own eyes, however, were only trained on one girl. Bernadette. She sat atop of a boy's lap in the back and his hands were in inappropriate places. I tear my eyes away and slide my fingers around his wrist, pulling him into my usual seat, the second back from the driver's seat.
The bus pulls away and I press myself against the side of the bus, looking to Jasper who looked both amused and uncomfortable.
"What?" I ask him.
"I haven't been on a bus for a few years." He says and I smile with a small chuckle, like it was our own inside joke. There were a few stops before us but once I go to put my bag on, Jasper takes it. "I'll carry it for you." He decides and I nod a little as the bus stops and I get up, leading him off the bus and I walk with him towards my house. "I-It might smell like alcohol, and I didn't have a chance to clean." I warn him and he smiles and nods a little. "It's alright." He tells me and I nod a little, not knowing what else to say but carrying on, turning the corner and coming up on my house.
"Well, this is it." I sigh and unlock the door, walking in first. He follows and looks all around as I lock the door. I hear a clatter in the kitchen and a thump and I freeze, looking to Jasper and then the entry to the kitchen. Jasper takes a step towards it but I latch my hand into his and drag him past it as quickly as I can and up the stairs. I push him into my room before closing the door. "Your mother?" He asks after a tense few moments.
"Y-Yeah." I mumble before realizing my room is a complete disaster. The clothes I had been going through this morning were still all over my bed, my drawers were pulled out and bras were hanging from weird places. There sat a stack of dirty plates and bowls in the corner from late night studying, and my blankets were falling off my bed and a pillow was across the room with thousands of things all over my desk.
"You know what?" I sigh, grabbing the stack of dirty dishes. "I'll be right back." I nod, trying to hide the burning embarrassment but I feel like he knew exactly what I was feeling. I rush down stairs and put the dishes in the sink and grab the bottle of Fabreeze to spray my room with. Rushing back upstairs, ignoring my mother on the couch, I walk in to see him hang up one of my shirts. "Jaspeeerrrr."i groan and he raises an eyebrow. "Stop cleaning." I complain and push him into my cleared desk chair that's usually also reserved for clothes. He chuckles and nods.
"Yes Ma'am." He replies, making my face heat up. "You can put on music if you want." I mumble and open up pandora on my phone, plugging it into my stereo and handing it to him as I start cleaning. I first organize my desk which was a task in it of itself. Then I hung up all of my clothes and made my bed, all the while Jasper was doing his homework or watching me bustle around. Looking to see he wasn't done yet, I take out all the trash in my room and I debated vacuuming but figured I'd do that this weekend. With a loud sigh, I collapse onto my bed, throwing my cardigan into the hamper and rolling onto my stomach, resting my head on my arms and looking to see Jasper looking at me before I close my eyes, waiting for him to tell me his tale of immortality.
"Let me start off by letting you know that I am a born and raised Texan man." I could hear the slow, rumbly drawl to his smirking voice, making me smile. "I grew up in the time of the Civil War. I lied about my age so I could fight for the Confederate Army." he informs me and I turn so I'm facing my head into my blankets, breathing softly and listening patiently.
"I became General by nineteen and even with my false age, I was still the youngest General the Confederates ever had." He pauses. "Then I met Maria." His voice turns dark and I feel an unpleasant emotion stir in me, almost jealousy.
"She was traveling with two other women at the time by foot so I stopped my hoarse and offered them my aid." He says and I had a feeling I knew where this was heading.
"Maria turned me that day and it was the most painful experience I've ever had in my years."
"Maria wasn't like any other vampire at the time. Now, you have to remember that vampires were having their own territory wars, just like the humans were. Maria built an army and won some and lost some, but then I came along."
"She usually only kept a vampire for the first year of their life, it's when we're the strongest because we still have the remains of our human blood in our system. I, was different."
"Some vampires have unique abilities, I can manipulate and empathize with a person's emotions. I never got weaker after my first year because I empathized with all the other new borns, newly turned vampires. I became the General of Maria's army." He pauses and I finally sit up and look at him. "Maria convinced me that she loved me, that's why she couldn't kill me. The woman was sadistic and really only used me for her gain..." He trails off and I feel the unpleasant feeling return. "When I was in that army, I murdered humans just as often as vampires. I manipulated human women, not that I really had to. I've taken advantage of them... That's why I can hold you and still not break you." He tells me and I look away from him eyes and down at my sheets, a shiver running through my body as I close my eyes and try to keep the disgust off of my face. I'm sure he could feel it though. "Vampires are naturally stronger and faster than humans. We can see farther, smell more, and we are your natural hunters." He continues.
"You are in danger every second you are with me, Xanthia." He informs me, stopping his story. I take an unsteady deep breath and look up at him. I scoot to the edge of my bed and grab his hand in mine, even though I'm shaking. I pull him up even though he could remain unmoved if he so pleased. He sits on my bed and I face my whole body to him.
"I... I can't tell you that what you did is okay." I shake my head no and he looks down at his lap but I refuse to let go of his hand. "I can't pretend to know why you did what you did." I continue softly, hearing my drunken mother break something down stairs.
"I also can't tell you that it doesn't matter what you did back then because it does... It's turned you into the person you are today." I smile and turn his face so he's looking at me. I run my thumb over his cheek and smile a little more, shaking my head.
"You are so important to me, and despite what had happened, I will be by your side for as long as I am able. But I want you to remember what you did. I want you to remember every girl's face." I say, my voice cracking as his eyes turn sad and pleading and I lean my forehead against his.
"Because if you do that, it'll never happen again, and I can have you all to myself." I explain and he looks hesitant before he leans in and presses his lips to my own. I take a deep breath, and smile at the fact that he could do this for hours and never have to stop to catch his breath. I move closer so I'm sitting on his lap and one hand tangled in his hair with the other pressed against his beat-less heart.
We pull away and I simply hug myself to him with all my strength and he hugs me tightly and strongly, not as if I'm a delicate flower, making me smile and nuzzle my head into his neck.