CAMBRIA

THIRTY-ONE

Cambria was elated. On Cloud Nine. She spent the remainder of the day in la-la land, hardly paying attention to anything, distracted by her thoughts.

It'd been so long since she'd felt like this.

Happy.

For the last six months, all she'd felt was devastation and hopelessness. After Lawson, she was sure she'd never find anyone. But that was okay, because she'd rather be happy in her solitude than miserable with someone else. But then she lost Jackson, and she realized she wasn't even happy in her solitude either. And since then, she'd be alone, and miserable, certain it would be this way for the rest of her life.

Until today.

Because today, she felt hope.

As Finn had said, this wasn't blind luck. This was fate. This was happening for a reason. There was something cosmic about it, as though everything was falling into place, exactly how it should.

And then, the doorbell rang.

She looked at the clock on the wall – it was quarter to ten. Nobody was home except her. They normally didn't get unexpected visitors.

It had to be Finn.

Hurrying down the stairs, she fixed her hair, adjusted her clothes, before taking in a breath and opening the door.

There before her stood Jackson.

It was like seeing a ghost.

"Hey, stranger," was the first thing he said. "Long time no see."
An eternity had passed since their last encounter. No, just six months. But it felt like an eternity all the same. She stood there, speechless, staring at him.
"Are you going to invite me in or just stand there?"
"What are you doing here?"
"I broke up with Natalia."
Cambria took a step backwards into the house, allowing him to enter.
They walked wordlessly to the kitchen. Jackson pulled out a chair and sat at the table. Cambria leaned against the counter. "You want a drink?"
"Do you even need to ask?"
She reached into the fridge and grabbed two beers, then slid into the table across from him. "I didn't think I'd see you again."
"Me neither."
"Yet, here you are."
"Here I am." He held her gaze, then opened the beer, took a drink. "You were right."
"About what?"
"Everything. Natalia. Us."
"Hm."
"We weren't right for each other. How I didn't see it sooner, I don't know."
"What happened?"
"Doesn't matter now. It's over."
"When?"
"Last night."
"And your first thought was to come here."
"Yeah."
"Why?"
"I've missed you."
She didn't respond right away. Then she said, "I've missed you too."
"How have you been?"
"Honestly? Not good. I've been a mess without you."
"I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry?"
He shrugged.
"I want to apologize," she said. "For what I did. For how I acted. If I had known I was going to lose you, I never would have done that."
"We don't need to talk about it." He paused. "But I'm sorry too. For how I treated you."
"Did you hate me?"
"No. Was I angry? Yes. But if you would've showed up at my house with a bottle of wine, I probably would've forgiven you."
"Are you serious?"
"Yeah."
"I've spent the last six months miserable. And you're telling me that's all it would've taken?"
He laughed.
"You told Mara you never wanted to speak to me again."
"Yeah, I was mad."
"So you didn't mean it?"
He shrugged. "I don't know. I guess it doesn't matter now."

There was so much on her mind, so much she wanted to say, that she didn't even know where to begin. All she knew was that there was something inside the both of them that brought them back together, time and time again. A magnetic pull, like gravity. Just as the sun would rise each morning, they would always return to one another.

They fell back into old routine quickly, finishing their drinks, getting another. And another. Then out came the shot glasses, and before long, they were both drunk.

"Do you remember that first night," she said, "that you took me around Pine Hills. And we ended up at the abandoned house by the water?"
"Yes."
"I always wondered... When you asked if you could kiss me, what would've happened if I said yes."
"But you didn't."
"I know."
"Did you want me to kiss you?"
"Yes."
"Then why'd you say no?"
"Because of Theo. But it was always there, at the back of my mind. What if? What if it had been you, from the very start, not Theo?" She paused. "But I guess it doesn't matter because you met Natalia that very same night."
"Only after you left with Theo."
She held his gaze. "What are you saying?"
"Nothing. Doesn't matter. Like you always say, everything happens for a reason."
"Do you believe that?"
"I do."
"So these last three years..."
He didn't respond.
Neither did she.
Jackson checked his watch. "It's late. I should probably get going."
"Okay."
They both stood, then walked down the hallway, to the front door.
They stood there for a moment. Cambria idled near the door. Jackson didn't move. He just stared at her.
"What about now?" he said suddenly.
"What?"
"What would you do if I kissed you now?"
She held his gaze for a moment, unwavering.
And then he kissed her.

Her hands found his face naturally. They stumbled backwards, Cambria's back against the wall as he kissed her. She brought her hands to the back of his neck, ran her fingers through his hair. He moved his lips to her neck, and her head lulled back. He picked her up and she wrapped her legs around him. He gripped her thighs as he walked up the stairs, carrying her to her bedroom.

This time was different. It wasn't a mistake, and it wasn't accidental. This time, they knew what they were doing. And they both knew what they wanted.

Six months of agonizing torture without him, believing she would never see him again. And here he was, in her arms, in her bed, yet again.

He would always come back to her.

He pulled back and looked at her. In his eyes she could see longing, lust, sorrow. They mirrored hers. But she was enraptured. She had never felt more connected to him than she did in that moment.

And maybe, just maybe, things could be different this time.

Afterwards, they lay next to each other, their breathing synchronized. It was quiet for a very long time. So long, in fact, that Cambria wondered if he had fallen asleep.

"Jackson," she spoke his name through the silence of the dark. There was something she needed to say, something she needed to ask. It had been on her mind for so long, the question lingering, and it needed to come out, needed to become a real, tangible thing, no longer living solely in her head. She knew as soon as she said the words aloud, it would change everything. But she needed to know.
"Cambria."
She could hear her heart beating in her chest. "Can I ask you a question?"
He took a moment to respond. "Sure."
She hesitated. She could still back out, tell him never mind. Go to sleep. Move on. Forget it ever happened.
But she couldn't. Not anymore.
"Are you in love with me?"
It was silent again. Perhaps he had already drifted to sleep.
But then he spoke, repeating the question. "Am I in love with you?" More silence. "Are you in love with me?"
She didn't respond.
Neither did he.

But that said everything, didn't it?