"All I'm saying is, ain't no way in Hell am I dating another fire sign poet, rapper, or whatever the fuck creative. This motherfucker put me on their little Soundcloud mixtape of an audio message I sent in private... PUSSY ASS NIGGA. And I ain't get no type of credentials or anything. He used me. He used our relationship for clout!"
Raja Tyler listened to her best friend, Rin Thomas rant about her recent beau that she met on Tinder. It was another venture gone wrong. Raja usually liked to stay quiet and let Rin rant over a blunt and a little wine cooler. She was the quiet one in their duo. Despite being the most fashionable and well-connected, she liked to be an introverted extrovert. She also preferred to listen than to speak.
Rin blew her nose and then continued smoking the blunt that she rolled with Honey Backwoods. "I just want to know what the fuck I'm doing wrong. I wanna be like you and not like niggas."
"It's not that I don't like them," Raja interjected. "I just haven't met the right one."
"Yeah. Tuh." Rin rolled her eyes as she rolled down the window of Raja's Mercedes Benz to let the ashes of the blunt drop to the cement of the empty 7-11 parking lot. "You can tell me if you're gay, Raj. I would love you just the way you are. Be who you areeee, for your priiiiideeee."
Raja quietly beat Rin's ass in her head before blowing the smoke out of her own blunt. "You a weirdo, RinRin."
"Nah. Tell me have you taken any strap before? Or gotten head from a girl?"
Raja wriggled her nose at the thought. Women were beautiful, but not her steez. She saw them as platonic companions, not people she would spend the rest of her life with. Rin was her platonic soulmate, her right hand woman, her ace. If she were a man, maybe she would consider dating her. She was beautiful, too. Curly hair, beautiful brown eyes and a smile that could light up a town. Plus, their personalities were contrasting ever so perfectly to the point, they just complimented one another.
Rin smirked. "Don't knock it til you try it. I fucked this one stud who performed at an open mic night, took her to my apartment and she had me-"
"Girl," Raja tsked, folding her arms. A Whitney Houston song played on the radio. It calmed the atmosphere. Rin eventually stopped stressing over her little fling and began to mellow out. That was what Raja always provided: a safe space.
Though she always provided an ear for Rin, she never really told Rin her recent venture with her perfect, narcissistic ex boyfriend, Zayde. He was a basketball player. The arrogant type. He backed up everything he said in the bedroom, but not mentality-wise. He was a cheating, lying bastard. If Rin knew that Raja was letting him hit, she knew that she would be judged. Because how the fuck was Raja Won Kenobi, the man guru, fucking the most idiotic choice of all men? Raja would easily say it's because the pipe was too good deny.
Granted, Raja spoke on other adventures with men she had dated with Rin, of course. This one was just a special case because she did love him. And she loved him hard. Raja never loved anyone before. Here she was 23, loving on a fine ass demon. Oh, and he was also a fire sign. She was not about to sit and rant about astrology with Rin all night. That was not her mood. Zayde's tattooed face appeared in Raja's mind, she shook it away, thinking about the patients she was going to have to deal with in the morning. "Rinrin, I'm getting kinda tired. I think we should head back to the apartment before I'm too fried to drive."
"You right. And I'm starting to get paranoid staring at these trees."
"Miss Girl..." Raja laughed, rolling her eyes.
Whitney's buttery voice carried through the speakers as Raja drove to their tiny apartment complex called The Rio Manor. It was frequented by young people who worked in the area or their parents decided to give them a little spot of their own. Raja parked her car in front of the pool gate, which was situated near their unit. Rin got out of the car and began fumbling for her keys.
Raja was exhausted from crying all night and working as a receptionist at the local hospital. Though it was her life, sadness really made her exhaustion more prominent. Rin, oblivious to it, was ready to chow down the Panda Express meal that they got earlier with P-Valley on.
Raja wanted to be alone and be in her bag for a moment, though. The joy in Rin's eyes was too hard to deny. How could she bounce back like that? Raja knew it was those late nights discussing their self worth that empowered her to not dwell on a no good nigga. So, why was she still thinking about one? And why could she not talk about it like Rin just so openly did.
10 months ago...
Raja looked around the restaurant for the man she got her number from earlier that day. He looked like one of them types who would definitely stand you up. But, she believed him. It was going to be 10:30 and the bar's cooking part was closed. She was not about to drink on an empty stomach. She stood, collected her purse and decided to leave.
That was when a tall, tattooed man showed up to the spot, begging the waitresses to serve them their finest steak, while making a bee line for her table. The consideration in his eyes was strong. He was still in his basketball uniform, which signified that he got there as soon as he could. His hair was frizzy from the sweat and rain.
He looked over at Raja and smiled like a little boy who just stole candy. A grin slathered in mischief and too much charm. "Sorry, I'm late. Coach had us run around the center a couple times. I got caught up. But, I just had to come to you, shawty."
"You're late," Raja pouted. "I told you, I don't like wasting my time."
Zayde came up, his height was perfectly above over her frame by a good foot and a half. It made her melt. He leaned down to kiss her forehead. "You ain't gonna waste your time with me."
"We shall see," Raja said, unenthused.
present time...
After retreating to her room, she checked her phone to see no new messages or phone calls. She was being such a simp, but she couldn't help it. She decided to FaceTime him. It had been weeks since she heard his deep voice. It would probably make her melt if he answered, because he always used to. But, things changed. He had ghosted her.
FaceTime was unavailable.
Raja was not the one to double text or double call. She needed him to know that she could be just as distant. However, she ended up crying once again. Soaking her satin sheets that she bought herself, in an apartment that she paid for. Even bad bitches had their moments too. They just knew how to hide it well.
