You're The Bad Guy

First Day Of Senior Year

School

Yay

I absolutely love school

You know, that prison that holds us for eight hours a day, five days a week and makes us physically and emotionally drained with the excessive amount of unnecessary work they pile on us

Yeah

That

I love school

I drag myself from my mess of a bed and pull out a random pair of jeans and oversized tee from my closet

I have never been one to care about my appearance and the fact that my hormones are an absolute mess means I definitely need something discrete (if you know what I mean)

I hate this so much

Why did I have to be born like this?

I am literally the result of nature's fart

A complete and utter mistake

I would do anything to be a normal girl but no

Clear the universe hates my existence

-

I arrive at school to be greeted by my best friend jumping directly on the hood of my new car

1969 Mercury Cougar XR7

Sexy right?

"Victoria, get the fuck off of my car!" I yell with my top half hanging out of the window

"Bitch, don't tell me what to do" she laughs as she jumps off of the bonnet "Now hurry up, I heard there's a new kid"

"Ugh you're unbearable" I groan as I lock my car and Victoria drags me to class

I claim my seat at the back of the class and relax in my chair

I'm the girl that no one notices which is amazing

It means I know everything without getting involved

It also means no one bothers me

Well

That was how it was until last year

I was at a sleepover with a couple of other girls in my class and my dumb ass fell asleep first

In doing so, they decided to play the most despicable prank in the history of pranks

You know, the usual "let's pull Sydney's pants down while she's sleeping and then leak her nudes" prank

They were certainly surprised to see that I had an eleven inch cock instead of a vagina

And like that, the rumour spread like wild fire

Let's just say I never spoke to those bitches again

Since then, I've had a lot of unwanted attention from females

Whether it's them wanting to see it, touch it or even ride it, it's very annoying and uncomfortable for a straight girl as myself

But the harrasment didn't end there

There were also guys bullying me about my size and whether it was real or not

If it wasn't real then would I be in this situation?

No

I wouldn't

So yay

I'm that freakshow girl with a penis