Quiet | Seungjin

19

Dear future Seungmin,

I usually only write in my journal when I feel upset about something or just had a long day. Right now, I'm not upset nor did I have a bad day—I've had a really good week actually. Hyunjin came over a couple days ago and I just found a place to hang the flower he painted.

He's really talented. He's a lot of things actually...I think that he might be the most interesting person I've ever met. I'm not too sure why I like Hyunjin so much or why I feel comfortable spending time with him alone. If it was any other boy my age I don't think I'd be able to look him in the eyes, but I never feel nervous around Hyunjin. For some reason, he really cares about me and always makes sure that I am comfortable. He never makes me talk if I don't want to and that makes being friends with him really easy. Everything is easy with Hyunjin. He doesn't mind talking for me or sitting with me when something happens at school.

In a way, he makes me feel like I deserve having a friend. I've always thought that nobody would want to be my friend. I do have other friends like Shuhua, but we've never spent time together outside of school. Hyunjin is just really special to me even if that is really sudden. I hope he never gets tired of me.

Seungmin looked up from his journal when he heard a quiet knock on his bedroom door, his brother letting himself in just a few seconds after. "Hey," he spoke softly as he glanced around Seungmin's room, looking at the small, unfamiliar painting hanging next to the closet. "I'm leaving to go back to campus in about an hour."

A small frown formed on Seungmin's lips, his eyebrows knitting together in frustration at his own silence. There was so much he wanted to talk about with his brother. So much he wanted to say, but he just couldn't.

"I'm going to try to text you more, is that alright? I feel like we talk less and less every time I go back to school."

The younger quickly nodded, eager to know everything about Wonpil even when he was away from home. He had always thought so highly of his older brother...he would spend every waking moment with the elder if he could.

After it happened, Seungmin didn't say a single word to anybody for nearly a year. He didn't even do as much as hum or nod, he was nearly lifeless, but there was always somebody at his side. Wonpil would come home from school every day and tell his younger brother all about his day, even if Seungmin wouldn't do as much as look at him. Not a day passed where Seungmin didn't hear his voice or see his smiling face and that's what helped him heal the most.

"I'm...going to miss you," Seungmin forced out after spending a few minutes building up the stamina. He watched as a smile spread across Wonpil's face, the elder reaching out to place his hand gently on top of his own for just a second.

"Oh I'm going to miss you so much more, Seungmin. Being away from you is what makes me the most homesick...I've always been so protective of you and I hate being so far."

"I'm okay," he whispered, not caring how loudly his head was screaming for him to shut up. He shook away the ringing in his ears and leaned forward to wrap his arms around Wonpil's shoulders, feeling the elders arms wrap around his own body loosely.

"I love you, Seungmin," Wonpil told the boy as he relished in the feeling of Seungmin resting in his arms. He smiled as Seungmin hummed, not able to get the right words out, but he still knew exactly what the younger meant.

✨✨✨

After watching his brother back out of the driveway and set off in the direction of his college, Seungmin found himself back in his room. He scoured his bookshelf for a book he hadn't read yet, trying to find something to pass the time now that Wonpil wasn't there to keep him company. He read the spine of each book carefully, the wear on the books being deceptive as some of them had been bought second hand. It took a few minutes, but Seungmin finally spotted a title he wasn't familiar with.

Once he picked out the bookmark he wanted to use and got comfortable on his bed with the book, he heard his phone buzzing from across the room. His eyebrows furrowed together as he glanced at his desk where he left the device, wondering why he was suddenly getting so many notifications.

With a sigh, he set the unopened book down on the comforter and pushed himself off the bed, walking over to sit at his desk. Seungmin's confusion only heightened when he switched on the device to see had been added to a group chat consisting of him, Hyunjin, and two unknown numbers.

Hi Seungmin
I stole Hyunjin's phone and got your number
It's Jisung btw

I'm Felix!
I distracted Hyunjin while Ji grabbed his phone

However confused he still was, Seungmin couldn't help but smile at the text messages. Even if he couldn't see their faces, the two boys were just the same as when he talked to them at lunch.

Hi, he typed out at last, not knowing what else hd was supposed to say in this sort of situation.

Oh my god
Seungmin I am so sorry you can block them

He couldn't help but laugh at Hyunjin's message. It was funny to him how embarrassed the elder seemed to be of his two friends. Felix and Jisung were quite the overwhelming duo, but Seungmin still found them interesting. That was why he found himself sending a simple it's alright, because he truly didn't mind talking to them for just a little bit.

Yeah Hyunjin, quit trying to get rid of us.

———

Thanks for reading