Idyllic

Pouty lips💋

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I feel like a piece of shit.

I literally feel like the shitiest piece of shit that ever walked this earth.

After some long hard and tiring thinking, I've finally come to realize how insensitive I was blaming him even though it's not entirely his fault.
Even though I've been a real jerk, I don't want to blame myself too much but I should apologize to him, at least.

Musstering up the courage, I gulp down my stubborn pride and start to take slow strides towards the closed bedroom door.

He's been in there for hours now and I'm starting to worry, he hasn't made a single sound.

I clear my throat and knock on the door three times."Hey, Fin? You hungry?"

I mean I didn't know what else to say, this is the only appropriate thing I can think of, at the moment.

When there comes no reply, I try again. Releasing a heavy sigh filled with guilt."listen, I just wanna say. . . I'm sorry. I know I've been acting like a jerk and dumping all the blame on you, again I'm sorry."

A few tantalizing minutes passes by, with every tick of the clock on the wall I felt my nerves spiraling.

It's been such a long time since I felt like this, since I acted like this. Believe it or not, I wasn't one for apologizing for the things I do, whether that be because I hurt someone's feelings or I unintentionally let my bitchy side get the best of me.

I never felt ashamed or sorry for my actions. Because I learned to love that about me.

But somehow, this stupid boy destroys that achievement I've built. Breaking down every brick so carelessly.

So, now here I am awaiting anxiously for his forgiveness.

I hate this. I hate this so much. But I can't seem to inhabit my bulldozing stubbornness I usually have.

Rustling behind the door caught my attention and my ears perk up. I hear soft footsteps nearing and then a few seconds of silence as if he is hesitating to open the lock. But than I hear a click and the door slowly creeps open.

A pair of doe-y ocean eyes peek at me from behind the door, his hands clutching on to the wood tightly, as if using it as a shield. Like I am a big scary monster he needs to protect himself from. That didn't fail to make me feel like even less of an ass. 

We silently stare at eachother for a while before I decided to break it feeling awkward under his accusing gaze.

I clear my throat, even though I had no particular reason to."I can fix you up something to eat if you want. You know, since you haven't eaten anything yet."

The sky is darkening into a tar black as the heavy clouds overshadow the stars, leaving the moon as the only soars of light besides the twinkling street lamps.

He does not say anything as he expands the door and walks briskly past me, still butt ass naked might I add.

I try to keep my wandering eyes from his plump posterior as it jiggles with every step he takes.

He somehow must have caught on at my shameless ogling because there is a slight sway in his step. I think he is taunting me. I can't allow him to set that trap again. He might come off as innocent but he is a manipulative little vixen underneath that facade.

With crossed arms and legs and pouty lips he glares at me expectantly. Indirectly telling me to fill his stomach already.

Well, I do know of other ways I could fill his stoma- No!, no ,no. Don't fucking go there you horny brain. Think rationally like you used to for fucks sake.

I blink my eyelids repeatedly trying to get rid of his erotic image and keep my gaze everywhere but him. I saunter towards the kitchen and hurriedly rummage through the contents in the fridge.

I decide on, creamy shrimp pasta.

Placing all the needed ingredients on the counter, I was about to bend down into the cabinet to get out the pots and pans when his snarky tone stops me in my actions.

"Your attempt at apologizing was pathetic. Could have done better."

I'm taken aback by his words as it struck me like a snake spitting venom. I'm offended. I'm more offended than a Karen spying on black people partying in their yard at a family cook-out.

The audacity.

My left eye twitches and I clench my fist around the pan's handle until my knuckle turns a lighter shade as I try to hold back voicing my irritation.

I shouldn't get so worked up easily. Some part of me feels like he is deliberately pushing my buttons just to get a kick out of it.

I'm not gonna go down this road again with him. It stirs nothing but unnecessary stress in my mental. Plus I don't want anyone's feelings getting hurt again and I definitely don't wanna have resort to that little valoptuous moment we had a while back. Defiantly not.

I take a deep breath and turn my attention towards him.

"Listen, I'm trying here, okay? I acknowledge the fact that I haven't been the nicest person lately and I feel bad for using you like that." I clear my throat and add." Even though you did technically throw yourself at me." He opens his mouth to protest but I cut him off. "I would still like to formally and sincerely apologize to you, though. I do hope you can accept my declare of peace between us and find it in your heart to forgive me."

My voice softens a tad." No one deserves to be treated like that by anyone, especially you, Fin. You don't deserve it."

I finish off, my eyes full of integrity as I express my honest emotions to him. Taking the first step forward to openly communicate like adults, is very important otherwise all this chaotic quarrels will get us no where near to understanding eachother.

The expression on his face doesn't display his emotions as he just stares at me.

That damn feeling is returning again, nervousness. It settles in the pit of my stomach adequately as I await his response.

The longer I stare, the more I start to notice a rosy pink tinted colour reside on his pale cheeks. He shifts his gaze from mine hastily.

And with crossed arms and pouty lips, he mutters.

"I hate you."

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We're in the sassy man apacolypse y'all 💅💅
The men are in their soft girl era🧚‍♀️
And I can't say I hate it ;)

🥀🌼🥀🌼