alluring

☆.｡. mashihoon

it took a while to accept mashiho's decision ; it was difficult, especially for one of them

no one was allowed to enter. even mashiho.

"hyung, please..." he knocked on the door, softly. "open the door. talk to me."

hearing a dejected sigh from behind, more precisely, hearing ten sighs behind his back, almost creeping his nape, he swiftly reflected himself.

"talk to us."

a few hums of assent reached his ears this time. firm, but a little tentative "we are a group, we have to settle such situations together jihoon-ah." escaped hyunsuk's mouth.

yet no response.

mashiho's hand loosened, lining his body. he turned to the members, who right now couldn't, but look at him still with feelings of foreboding parting, either weighting or unsettling their hearts.

"for how long, mashi?"

junkyu's vibrant voice. then silence again. mashiho discerned a tear strolling down yedam's cheek. he never had it easy to curb his emotions in such situations, all of them thought.

at this point, no one really knew what decision he had made, intending to share it tonight. mashiho did it faster than he could. the boy was right now too afraid to speak up.

after seeing their smiles slowly fading as the realization came, the spangles in their orbits stifling, the sobs somewhere from the corner where junghwanie stood. he made up his mind, he will tell them, but not tonight.

"until next year."

still, all of them could handle it, respect it, understand – but one.

jihoon threw quite a fit.

first tried to decline what has happened. secondly, started persuading. when this failed, a helpless groan escaped his throat. then a few quickened words, half-whispers, his hands put on mashiho's arms, pleading.

"don't leave us, we will take care of you, I promise."

these were not empty words, and mashiho was well aware of that. but he needed to go back. needed to see his family again, his childhood friends.

"don't you think we are tired too? we are, all of us, but we can make it! together!"

the beseeching turned into desperate scowling. mashiho looked at him with swollen eyes. he knew that his hyung will be the most difficult to convince that this was what he wanted.

"how can you leave us!" everything he did so far, went in vain. when people feel helpless and out of hope, they grab the last rope not to drown – they shout, mindlessly. "how can you be so selfish?!"

after that he locked himself in the room, not letting anyone in.

twenty minutes felt like two days at the least. boys have soon dispersed, some went to the living room, some to the kitchen. one consoling another, holding hands or hugging.

mashiho finally had a chance to explain. slowly, the members comprehended, and with heavy hearts, accepted the inevitable.

his body, and his mind, needed it, truly needed it. the time when he could be 'takata mashiho' and not 'treasure's takata mashiho' always and everywhere. and after he repeated the nth time that "I will be back to you in no time", junkyu assented to let go of his shorter frame, hyunsuk smiled despite his soaked cheeks and watched as their member went to confront their missing piece.

they heard a knock, limp, for mashiho's hands were still quivering.

"hyung, please... I am not leaving yet, won't you talk to me again before I go?"

silence. jeongwoo cuddled closer to yoshinori, shuddering at the sudden chill that hung in the air.

"...won't you miss me?"

doyoung's chin shuddered, he bit his lip to hinder the tears from falling again.

at this moment the sound of the latch being opened seemed like a shaft of moonlight in the darkening sky.

then all they could hear were shuffling, distancing footsteps. then whispers. and finally sobs.

jihoon choked on his tears once, twice, and hyunsuk started crying too, being soon embraced by haruto who stood by his side.

another twenty minutes of anticipation. ten members gathered in the living room, less or more willingly being able to hear all the confessions made in the previously locked room.

they understood, they came to know the truth in the way probably neither mashiho nor jihoon wanted them to. still, they couldn't reverse the time.

after a while, which felt like an eternity, treasure were complete again. the last vacant spot on the sofa was now acknowledged by jihoon, and mashiho who placed himself comfortably on the former's thighs.

the older boy made an implicit apology. for what he did, what he said. it was not necessary, for the eleven pairs of eyes in the room conveyed nothing, but a message 'we know, we understand.'

the dusk has been long gone, dawn approaching. no one has slept even a wink, but no one wanted to either. being close to each other was all that mattered to them at that specific moment, for if they were to divide one day, they wished to be able to say then that there is nothing they regret.

and so it happened. when twelve decreased temporarily, there was nothing left unsaid or undone. 

// ✧ //

because I know all of them cried before saying goodbye