A Different Life, A Different Story

Indie - My name's not Malauge

Another session.

I sit on the sofa but she stands me up and says, "So, I gathered up all of the data from your story and I'm giving you a notebook to write your thoughts and everything down, okay?"

"What? I thought I was going to talk to you about it!" I say feeling like my world's crumbling before my very eyes.

"There is no reason to panic. Calm down. Your uncle just said that you won't be needing therapy anymore."

"W-why?" I say as questions start to float in my head.

"Because you guys are moving next month."

"What?" I feel my heart pounding as the whole world's dissolving or I'm the one dissolving into oblivion past the mountains and the trees, past the waves of the vast ocean waves and the underground groundhog holes, and past the whole universe.

"He didn't tell you?"

"No he did, but..." I feel like crying and screaming all at once. I feel weak and afraid.

I turn to Uncle Kimmy.

"Hey how--"

"Don't hey me! Like we're friends or buddies. You lied to me!"

"What? About the moving thing?"

I don't answer I just slam the car door hoping that I broke it.

"No, not at all. Malauge--"

"My name's not Malauge! I'm Indie! I'm fucking Indie! So say it god damn right!"

"Woah, Woah! Hey, don't talk to me like that!"

I get out of the car starting to walk as tears stream down my face.

"Where are you going!?"

"I'm walking home!"

"M-Inde!"

I stop, "What?" My voice breaks making me want to curl up in a tiny ball and die.

"Indie, please get back in the car. It's faster and I don't want you getting hurt."

"Fine," I snap at him getting in the car again.

The whole ride home is quiet. I wipe my face with the sleeve of my flannel.

"Where'd you get the flannel from?"

I don't answer.

"So, not talking, huh?"

The real answer was from my friend Ty Sjn. She's so nice. she has long, dark hair, the most beautiful brown eyes, and has the cutest little dimples when she smiles. She is half Asian and half Mexican. I'm mixed. How boring is that?

We go home and we go inside the house. I storm up to my tiny room to text Ryan, aka, my crush:

ME: hey

Ryan 😘: hey guess what

ME: what?

Ryan 😘: I just finished a series and I'm rewatching "The Good Doctor"

ME: can I come over

Ryan 😘: nope sorry 😅

ME: why?

Ryan 😘: can't I'm grounded

ME: then get off grounding then 🙄

Ryan 😘: we can hang out @ school and that's it bc my mom will 😵😵 if a girl in the house 😅

ME: she wont no ill b gone

Ryan ;): 🙈 😱 😀 😎 💩 🙉 👽

ME: ? 🤣🤣

Ryan ;): bye gn 🤣

I grab my pillow and scream into it. Not even my crush wants to hang out with me. Uncle Kimmy goes into my room.

"Sorry for earlier. You didn't deserve that." I say as he sits on my bed.

"It's okay, Mally."

I glare at him.

"Indie."

"Why give me a name and not call me by it?"

He laughs, "Good point. But ever since you were a baby, we called you Mally, Mal, or Malauge."

"But I'm not either one of those people, I'm Indie."

"Okay, okay. You're growin' on me, slow down, slow down you're getting too grown for me."

I love my uncle, he always finds a way to make me laugh or crack a smile even when I'm in my darkest moments. I know he'll always be there for me even when the people that I love, bail on me.

"Ty Sjn's having a birthday party, can I go?"

"Sure. Don't be late."

"Okay," I squeal hugging him.

"Night, fave fun."

"Night. Thank you."

"I trust you."

"And you better. Ty Sjn's so innocent and amazing."

I wait until he leaves my room, but before he goes I tell him to get Cassy for me.

"Yeah?" She says leaning up against my door frame.

"What should I wear the green silk dress with a jean-jacket or this flower dress?"

"The jean-jacket with the green dress, it'll look cute."

"Okay, thanks."

"You should put your curly mess into two buns."

I laugh, "No, you're serious?"

"Yes, I'll help you."

"Nah, I'm straightening my hair."

"Why?!"

"Because it suits the outfit more."

"Who cares about a silly outfit, love your natural hair."

"I do."

"Then wear it in buns."

"No," I complain, "That's so stupid."

"No, you're beautiful."

"Look, I asked you what outfit I should wear, not what hairstyle. I know what I'm doing!"

"Alright, alright. You're growing up on me."

"Good! I don't wanna stay here anyway, no offense," I sarcastically smile as I sling my purse on my shoulder and go downstairs after an hour or two of straightening my messy, unmanageable hair, "Bye, Cass, love you!" I walk out the door. I hope Ryan's there, I think to myself, as heat goes across my cheeks like the ocean waves on the seashore. Too bad Ty Sjn's parents don't like it when boys are over, but I hope Ryan's an exception. He's funny and sweet. He always makes me laugh, not like my uncle, but for a white boy, he knows what he's doing.

I wait for her parents car to pull up. Usually, her mom picks us up, but today I guess her dad is. They speak their native language, Korean, while I listen to my music the whole way there.

I can't speak any other language except English. Pathetic.

After her party, Uncle Kimmy asks how it was I say fun and then he kisses my forehead goodnight, like usual, and says "Okay, night again, bunny."

"And a goodnight again to you, Mr. Fox," I say in a sheepish voice impression of an old tv show we're watching together. Every Saturday, we watch old movies on a DVD player or listen to old music on a coset player. It's either the 1920s to 1980s our music taste is never the 2000s we're too "cool" for that. Cooool.