To Run and Hide

Part 2: The Travelling Show

Blindingly white snow woke me up. I blinked sleepily, my limbs numb and shivering from the bite of the cold. Even in the basement where I slept in Invidia Hall, where there was a hearth, I was constantly cold. All the Invidia hall servants were scantily dressed, with only a ragged brown wool dress and a red shawl to keep them warm. I wrapped my own shawl around me and heaved myself up, my teeth chattering. I looked around at my surroundings. I was in a small clearing, tall pine trees surrounding me. I looked behind, and let out a soft gasp as I saw Invidia Hall, high on the mountain. The dark stone towers and peaks looked like death's palace itself. I shivered, not from the cold, but from the painting in my mind of my sister being harmed. The idea of Lord Anwir ever laying a hand to Wynter again terrified me.

I pulled my eyes away from the castle and instead turned to the other side of the clearing, sleeping through the trees. Now that I could think clearly I knew what I should do. Find something, someone, to take me in and give me work. I made my way through the trees, twigs catching on my hair and my shawl. I knew what I must've looked like, but I didn't care. Not in the slightest. All I cared about was finding somewhere safe to live so I could eventually go back and find Wynter and her child. Someday, I promised myself, I will face Lord Anwir - and I will be the one to kick him out.

The trees thickened and so much I had to squeeze through them. I pushed myself through a small gap, and was met with a desolate road. Lonely and calm. It was covered in snow, with not even a sign of a wagon nearby. I walked along it, away and away from the castle. As far as away as I could go, for now.

I travelled until the sun began to set. By then the holes in my shoes had already grown, and my feet ached and ached. Hunger shadowed my every movement, coupled with exhaustion and dehydration. And yet I still walked, desperate for some kind of future for me. I knew that Lord Anwir had thrown me out thinking I would die and never bother him again. I needed to prove him wrong, no matter the sacrifice.

It was well past nightfall when I heard the clunking sound of wagon wheels. I turned and, in the darkness, saw a beacon of light moving towards me. I stilled, curious to see what it was. If it was someone who could help me.

As it moved closer I saw that it was not one wagon, but multiple. All were painted cheerfully with the words 'Lawson Traveling Show' decorating the sides.

"Are you okay, young one?" Called a kind voice from the nearest wagon. "Do you have food, a place to stay? Work, perhaps?"

I considered their unspoken offer. The travelling show's potential offer of work was enticing.

"I have no food, no place to stay and no work." I said with as much strength as I could muster. The wagon still came closer, stopping when it reached me. A lady stepped out. I couldn't see well in the scant lamplight, but she looked to be middle aged. Her skin was freckled, her hair brown streaked with grey. She stood tall. The woman grabbed my cold hands and pressed them in between hers.

"Oh, my poor dear - you must be cold! Please, we must offer you food and clothing." She muttered to me. Turning behind her, she called for the wagons to halt. Another person stepped out, this time a middle aged man. His black hair was also streaked with gray.

"Another homeless traveller to add to our ranks?" He grinned.

"Only if she wants it to be so, Kade." The woman replied. She stepped closer to him and leaned her head on his shoulder. Married, I thought to myself.

"I would love to work." I stuttered into the open air. The woman stepped towards me again.

"Lovely to hear. I am Brielle, and this is my husband Kade. We run the Lawson Traveling Show. What is your name, dear?"

"Carmyn Laurier. What job shall I have?"

"Why, I would be delighted if you would be a cook for us - only until we reach Icotan, in Trona, of course."

I accepted her offer, and she offered me soup. I went into the cover of the trees to change into new clothes - a homespun dress with a coat and a brand new shawl, plain clothes but much better than the ones I wore before. She also gave me a second hand pair of boots that didn't fit her son anymore. After I changed I held my old clothes. I was tempted to leave them there, but part of me resisted so violently that I ended up just stuffing them into the leather pack Kade had given me.

I thought over my new plan in my head. I would work as a cook and dishwasher with the show until they reached their next stop, Icotan, the capital of Trona. From there I would find work, maybe as a house servant. And eventually, I would come back to Vrinas and get Wynter out. Hopefully. Maybe.

The next few weeks were a blur. Everyday was the same as the other. I kept to myself, sitting on the outskirts of the camp when I wasn't working. I tried to help people with mundane tasks as much as I could, and when night fell, I helped Brielle with the food. When it was time to sleep, I crept out of the wagon I slept in and watched the stars. The stars have always felt like an anchor to me. A thing to keep me in reality when everything else crumples. I whisper my worries to the stars, and they float away for another time. Tonight I confessed my worries for Wynter to the stars. They offered comfortable solace for me. I still thought through the events that had happened at Invidia Hall.

"Are you okay Carmyn?" Whispered Kade from behind me. I jumped and turned around, only to see his concerned face.

"You weren't in the wagon, so I decided to look for you and - you are okay, right?" Kade continued. I nodded cautiously. He sighed and sat down beside me.

"Whenever a new person comes we deliberately don't ask questions about their past. I created the show as a refuge for lost wanderers. You don't have to tell us anything, but please know that we are here." With that Kade got up. My heart ached with his last sentence. I have never had a place where people cared for me. I am immensely thankful for the love they have provided to me, a broken girl with nowhere to go.

I looked around and leaned back. My hand brushed against something small and leather. I pulled my hand back and turned to see what it was. It was a small book, with a pot of ink, a quill and a note. I held the note up to the moonlight to see what it said.

'I saw you drawing in the dirt earlier. Try this instead.'

I smiled.