Chapter 21: Forgiveness

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"Hey, Mom, just calling again to check in with you," started Shino as she held her cell phone to her ear, leaving a voice mail for her mother, who, once again, didn't pick up when she called. "Everything is still going well on my end. I've...made a lot of progress with my fear of guns. I think...you'd be really proud of me. A-Also, I...feel like I've gotten some closure with what happened at the post office. The closure I needed; I think. I-I really hope that, one day, you can get some closure with what happened as well, mom. You deserve that much. A-Anyways, I hope everything is going well with you, on your end. And, if you have time, please call me back. I really miss you and it feels like we haven't talked in forever. Okay. Love you, mom. Bye."

Shino hung up her cell phone, as soon as she finished leaving her message for her mother.

"Why won't you answer, mom?" Shino asked herself, sadly. "Are you mad at me...for what happened at the post office or...are you mad at yourself? Knowing you, it's probably the latter. I just wish things could go back to normal so badly but I know that's impossible."

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The next day, Shino found herself staring at a headstone with the name "Ikeda Masaru," engraved onto it. It didn't take much research on Shino's end to find out the location of where he had been buried since the incident with the post office was all over the news. It made Shino sick to her stomach, thinking about how news agencies and reporters made such a spectacle out of such an awful incident for everyone involved. She had decided to visit the grave, after her conversation with Ikeda's son, Kudo, when the two of them fought in the first round of the Bullet of Bullets. Now that she was standing in front of the gravestone, though, she had no idea what she was supposed to do. Shino took a deep breath, feeling herself getting stressed just from standing in front of the headstone of the man responsible for the trauma that both her and her mother had to constantly deal with on a day-day basis.

"I-I spoke with your son," Shino spoke to the headstone. "I-It was always a fear of mine. That the man I was responsible for killing...had a family and, now, I know that you do. A good family, for that matter. A good family that...you're never going to be able to see, again, because of what I did. I know I shouldn't have any regrets. If I hadn't acted when I did, there's no telling what you would have done to my mom. I protected her from you but, in the process, made the biggest mistake of my entire life. I-I hated you for so long. I hated you for the pain you caused my mom and I both. I put all of the blame, solely, on you. But, I've realized that hasn't done me any good. I'll never be able to understand why you did what you did and your son seems to hate you for it. However, for some reason, I believe that you did have a reason for holding up that post office, even if I hate to admit it. I guess, what I'm trying to say is that...even though, a part of me still resents you for what you did...I-I still apologize for taking away your chance at ever seeing your family, again. I-If I could go back in time and, somehow, resolve that conflict, without having to resort to violence, I would. Although, there's no point in thinking that way, is there? This...isn't easy for me to say but...I...I...forgive you...for what you did. I don't know if that's worth much, at this point, but...I just...wanted to let you know that.

Shino sighed to herself.

"Life...can be a cruel thing, sometimes. So, so cruel."

Shino felt as though she had gotten everything off of her stomach that she had wanted to and began walking away from the gravestone, feeling like she had gotten even more closure with what happened at the post office.

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It had felt like I had spent days staring at my computer screen, reading different articles about the appearance of Death Gun and the impact he was having on the release of GGO. That was most likely because for the last couple of days, other than hanging out with Asuna a few times, the only thing I did was sit at this computer screen, hoping to learn something...anything about the masked man, who was responsible for killing Klein and putting Asuna through so much. Upon hearing what he had forced her to do in the first round of the Bullet of Bullets Tournament, it had caused me to become obsessed with finding out as much information about this man as possible so I could bring him down. It was the only thing I could do to help Asuna. Whenever I visited her, ever since what happened in that first round, I could just tell it was eating away at her. She had made so much progress in terms of her trauma and that son of a bitch, Death Gun, made everything even worse for her. I couldn't forgive that. Although, the countless articles that I read about the bastard didn't lead me to any clues about his identity. All the articles really talked about was how GGO was seeing a small drop-in activity from the player base because of the fear that they might suffer the same fate as Klein did. That was another thing. Klein's death. There was just so much that didn't sit right with me about it, the more I thought about it. After doing some digging into the creation of GGO, it seemed like the company responsible for making it had taken every initiative to make sure that no one would get injured, let alone killed. The company was all too aware of the fear towards VR that was apparent because of the SAO incident. The last thing that they wanted was a repeat of this. Then, how did Death Gun manage to kill Klein with that gun of his in VR? It would have helped if I knew how exactly he died but given how angry Kana was with me, I seriously doubted she would willingly tell me the details. She was the only one who knew since she was the one that found him. It wasn't her fault. I could only imagine how I would react if I found Asuna wearing her Nerve Gear and no longer being alive. Kana was just coping in her own way. And, a part of her was right. It was, partially, my fault that Klein had died. I was too busy fighting Vassago and if I would have just ran by him, to free Klein, then I could have made it in time.

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