When dark illuminate | ✎

|11| A blank paper

❝ You can paint anything on a blank paper; just hold the paintbrush first. ❞

. . . .

Life seems like a fun roller coaster ride until it drops back down at a higher speed; and you don't know how to breathe at that point. My life is no less than that kind of fun ride.

It's shiny just like the sun who's now playing hide & seek with the clouds. Sometimes with blazing fire; sometimes like a child — poking behind. It's scorching heat unlike the weather of Alaska. Always cold; but very calming.

My choice of getting here in NYC, can be described in many ways. One triumph card— I wanted to get away from my parents. I know, you must be wondering what kind of an ungrateful child I am.

Let me take you in a rewind story then. I'm the only child of my parents, fun fact they didn't bother for another since they're already fed up with the result of their reckless adventure.

Frankly speaking, it didn't bother me. They're always busy in their life; and I was left with my grandparents. Happy old times; now only nostalgia crawls back in the spine.

My day seems shallow now; same as old routines like getting up at 7 am, making something edible to eat, and running for the bus. For bread; I only have a small job in the coffee shop. Life was on the track when grandpa was alive. One of the reasons why I had wanted to be here.

I wanted to build an identity for myself; a little freedom you can say. So when I got a chance in the reputed college of NYC, my first instinct was to grab the chance by any crook.

It wasn't easy to convince my parents; even though they really don't care much — they were a bit possessive of me. But grandpa, he was always supporting. Since, he used to live here all by himself— I got the perfect chance to live here with him. Yeah, that was my cue to get my freedom. 

The last four years were the best time of my life. I used to live with my grandpa, making new friends, able to do what I have always wanted, and a part-time job in the coffee shop.

Until, the health of grandpa: started to fall down. And his demise last year, broke my every hope. I'm currently living in an old house; which grandpa left behind before his death. Thou' I don't need to worry about paying rent; but it's getting tough now with all the expenses.

The bus halted down; I am back at the harsh dreaming fantasy now; with the sweat drops. I started to look here & there.

Oh no! Sucks man, I am getting late again! Why the heck there's always going to be a huge traffic? I can never understand the system of NYC even after living many years now. Unlike any other big city; it's always rusting in the busy crowds. People don't even glance at each other here.

In a way, it's fine. Since I ain't a fan of being in the spotlight, it helps me to gather my thoughts. I guess there's no way; the traffic will be cleared in another hour. It's better if I walk from there.

Bustling up to walk from the busy alley, as much it seems easy; it's not. My phone started to ring in the meanwhile.

"Hello! Derrick, yes yes! I'm coming," I said.

"You better hurry up, Rylee. Martha is fussing here."

"Maybe she woke up in the wrong side," I said.

"Who knows!"

I hang up, noticed the message of my mother. It's better if I act oblivious to the text. I know she's asking me to come back. Gotta dispel the thoughts for now.