I'll Take What I Want From Your Heart (Gerard Way Fanfiction)

Past Should Still Be In The Past

Assuming he was already in his room, I knocked on Gee's door softly and only had to wait a few seconds before he opened it and let me in with a smile.

"I'm surprised you chose to sleep here.." His face now showed a little bit of guilt.

I dismissed his comment by saying, "You got any horror movies?"

He laughed, knowing that I was too tired to deal with anymore of the drama that came up earlier. He showed me a whole collection and I picked a random one to play. I looked around his room for a place to sit or sleep for the night, but there was nothing but his bed. He must've noticed what I was looking for and offered his bed to me, while he slept on the floor. It could be that way, the opposite way, or we could share the bed. I didn't feel comfortable with any of the options.

He laid on the bed and noticed my indecisiveness, so he patted the space next to him. Following his instruction, he said that we can watch the movie first and then decide.

I didn't want to watch the movie as much as I wanted to talk with him. And I guess he could notice things like that just as well as Mikey. He turned the movie down and began a discussion.

"I know you probably don't want to talk about this, but I need to address that I wasn't going to use you. I admit that I have used the 'guest room' act on girls before and I'm not proud of what I've done. I don't expect you to forgive me, but I just wanted you to know that I'm not a complete dick."

I didn't say anything back for a while because I didn't know what to say.

"I just need to know that you genuinely are not okay with what you've done and that you won't to it again. Because being taken advantage of is one of the most emotionally damaging things. I know that you didn't rape anyone but... it's still not okay. You know that." I explained.

"I know that." he stated clearly, like he wanted to prove to me that he wouldn't do it again. "And... are you suggesting that someone.. took advantage of you, Navy?" He asked with what I thought was anger.

"Gerard, I..." I really didn't want to bring this up, but I needed to let go do this somehow, "it was my father." I forced it out. "He was drunk and that's why.."

"Your mom.. I told you I got you when you told me earlier. Navy, this isn't okay."

"It wasn't recent at all. I don't know where he is. He's gone. And my parents have been divorced since the incident."

"I'm so sorry, Navy. I know you are tired. You should get some sleep."

He began to climb off the bed to sleep on the floor when I realized that I was still wearing my clothes from the night.

"Um, Gerard? Can I sleep in some of your clothes?"

"Oh! Yeah.. here." he said and handed me a pair of his boxers and a Misfits t-shirt. "I won't look, I promise."

So I changed behind him and he didn't look. Trust Points for Gee: 1.

He got back on his bed to plug in and charge his phone on the nightstand. I snuggled under the covers and before he got back up, I pulled him down, telling him that I have decided to share the bed.

He smirks and is happy to know that he has earned some trust. I fall asleep facing the other direction from his side.

*****

His alcohol breath engulfed my nostrils and stunned my senses.

I couldn't make myself mentally black out.

I was stuck, afraid, and weak.

My new forming bruises were already turning purple as he used me like a toy.

I was broken, mentally torn apart.

I had no one, nothing, an nowhere.

This wasn't living.

I died that day.

My screams for help clouded my memory just like his yells to shut up.

Hell took over and there was no God that night.

*****

I woke up to a worried Gerard. His face was washed over with fear and I actually saw a tear. Shit, I must've been screaming in my sleep.

"Im so sorry, Gee.. I didn't want to wake you up, it was just.. a nightmare."

"If that bitch ever comes back, I will make sure that you are safe. And if he even tries to touch you, I will.."

I cut him off, "It's only 12:30, Gee, get some sleep." He calms down and I curl into his chest, which I form into perfectly.

~~~~~

(A/N)

Hey! I've posted so much today because my brain did this thing which allowed me to think straight for once and this is the product! Lol
I'm thinking about doing a chapter just about navy's past just to give more insight to her world.
and before you think anything, no, I have not been raped and I don't know what it's like. I can't stand the topic and it makes me so mad to know that there are people in the world that think it is okay to take over someone's body in any way.
Like always, if you are reading this, thank you so much. And please comment!
Sooo... so far in the story, who do you think is better for Navy? Moikey, Gerd, or (don't worry, I'm not forgetting) Frank?
thanks for reading!