Me- Hey babe let's go out to eat.
Lauren- Okay.
Me-Okay get ready.
Lauren- Wait. Do I need a bra?
Me- Seriously?
Lauren- Well, where are going?
Me- What does it matter? Why would you not wear a bra?
Lauren- Well, if it's a buffet. Gotta leave room for my ribcage to expand.
Me- Put on a damn bra and lets go!
Lauren-No buffet then?
Me- Give me your phone!
———————————————————-
We stopped at a bakery store once and Lauren got down to get some corn tortillas. I let her go in and buy them and I told her to not get more than 15 or 20 unless it was a good deal. She came back out with 30 tortillas. I asked her how much it costs. She said the tortillas were 15 for one dollar or 30 for 2 dollars. I said, "That's the same thing!".
She said, "No, 30 is more, duh."
—————————————————————————————————————-
Lauren- DAD!
Me- What now?
Lauren- I need you to go to the store right now! I need pads, hot Cheetos, and ice cream. Lots and lots of ice cream!
Me- You are on your period again already?
Lauren- Oh My God dad why do you assume that!? I could just be hungry you know. You don't feed me enough. Why do you always think I am on my period!? I am not even acting like that! You are so annoying!
Me- You asked for pads.
Lauren- That's all you heard? Pads? Go get me food!
———————————————————————————————————————
YOU ARE READING
Blonde Moments: Life with a blonde teenage daughter.
Non-FictionMy daughter, as smart as she is, sometimes says the craziest things. This is a collection of actual quotes that came directly from her. You can't make this stuff up. I blame it on her hair.
