Miscellaneous

III- James

If I said that I was disappointed, simply I would be lying. From the way she was hastily asking to leave, then walking away without looking back just disappearing, the signs were right there. It was obvious that she flirted, messed around with me for quite a while, and fed me spoonfuls of honey so that I give her what she wants, then she leaves on cue.

So tell me why I'm sitting on my bed, devastated.

It's not like there was anything actually happening, nor did she ever care enough to tell me her name. Usually, when you meet someone, you at least manage to tell them your name. At least that could've happened, but of course, it didn't.

Quite frankly, it's not like I noticed her before she came up to me with that comment on my coat. Nor did I develop any interest, even if ever so slight, until she talked about showing me around Toronto. The way her amber eyes lit up as she spoke with pride, you could say I was an insect ready to be fossilized in them.

Now there are no amber eyes or luscious blonde locks of hair to admire, nothing but blank walls and a depressing bedroom.

"James?" My sister, Lara, is standing at the doorway. "You're eerily quiet today, I just wanted to...I don't know, check on you?"

I pat the spot next to me, "Sit with me, for a little while."

She closes the door behind her before sitting down and observing my face. I've known my sister all my life, yet she knows me better than I know myself. It's like she's gifted in a way, she understands the unseen and refuses to disregard any little thing, unlike me who's more concerned with the bigger picture.

"Something really shitty must've happened, something worse than Kai winning a game or two." She says, "Right?"

I shrug.

"James, when was I ever wrong? There's something that happened and we can't get past it if you won't tell me."

"Okay, Laramie, fine. I met a girl in the carnival, and then she disappeared without a trace because I must've scared her away." I start, "And that's not even the worst part, what's worse is that I was too goddamned blind to see the warning signs, she was in this for her mere advantage."

Telling Lara shouldn't have felt this relieving, but it did.

Her face falls and she puts a hand on my shoulder, calculating her response. She's walking on eggshells like I'm a kid and it pisses me off. I'm a man, I'm not afraid of a few words hurting me, I've got bigger concerns.

I'm a man. Yes, I'm a man.

"James...I don't think you could've seen this coming in any way, especially if you guys were hanging out and everything was fine and dandy."

I start pacing around the room because now, instead of being hurt, I'm enraged. How could I have fallen for such a scheme, at this time and age? Which part of "Trust no one" did I physically not comprehend?

Lara shifts as her eyes dart while following my silhouette. I pace for a little while before saying anything because I should be thinking, not feeling. I have been doing way too much feeling in a day when it should've occurred over a month or something equivalent.

Idiot, James.

"You know what? Forget it." I begin and before she says anything, I keep going. "There's a million other things I should be worried about in this world, that don't include some Paris Hilton wannabe. Case closed."

She chuckles, "You sound like mom, 'Case closed. Not a word, case rested.' You're picking up on her, it's not even funny."

"I would empty every single penny in my pocket to not become our mother, Case rested."

You see, Lara doesn't like sarcasm, so it is expected that any minute from now she will be committing a heinous crime against me. Here it goes:

"Shut up you look like a deformed monkey and it's almost disappointing that mom actually chose to have you. Absolute tragedy."

See, I told you, she shows no mercy.

"Anyway, enough razzle-dazzle. Dinner is served and it's probably either beyond cold or Zion has managed to vacuum it all into his never-ending storage of food."

I actually laugh at the end. I mean, it's true, Zion does have an astonishing ability to eat only so much food and manage to stay skinnier than a damned twig, he really is the world's favorite person. Not to mention that he's got three girls on him and he's what, ten at the most? Insane stuff to comprehend.

"You guys are way too late, I ate everything." Zion lies, a cheeky smile painted on his face. He begins eating right when we decide to sit, "Where's my thank you? I waited for you guys this time."

Lara messes with his hair before smiling at him, "Well, thank you, gentleman Zion."

"Yeah, stinky Zion, thanks alot."

He sticks his tongue out before downing a full glass of water, then devouring half the plate in the span of minutes. I don't eat mouthfuls, in fact, I barely eat anything before starting a conversation to divert the silence.

"So, Zion, tell me, excited for school tomorrow?"

He drops the fork and spoon just to go on a passionate rant about school which honestly, I do appreciate. It just reminds me of purity children will forever be able to have, until they grow up and life becomes a lot more than friends, strange hobbies, and stuffing yourself with endless food.

"First of all, I was thrilled when I saw the uniforms mom got for us. Then-"

"Mom got us uniforms?"

He nods, "Yeah?" She came by sometime when you and Kai left, dropped them off then left again. She said something about telling you guys she loved you." He says.

I pretend to listen to his rant when in reality I'm dwelling on the comment he made about mom picking up and dropping our uniforms. Knowing mom and her schedule, she would have never done this for us. Not even when we were residing in Moscow and her schedule was a little less packed, she simply never cared enough or wanted to take on the task.

Now she's suddenly doing it and she says something about loving us.

"Did she only drop the uniforms off and leave?" I ask, interrupting his never-ending rant that has Lara's full attention. Hell, she was even nodding and asking questions along the way.

He frowns at me, "Dude, why are you so invested in knowing what happened? She dropped off the uniforms, said she loved us, blew some kisses, and left. That's all."

I peer at Lara and she's motioning with her hands for us to stop, "James, cut it out." She whispers before going back to Zion. "Anyway, what were you saying Zion, something about integers?"

Almost instantly, I gather everyone's plates and dump them into the dishwasher before heading to my bedroom upstairs. The walls might be blank, and the colors might be a tad bit sad, but I've got a couple of pets to accompany me.

I'm not some depressed, black-and-white guy with a gut-wrenching bedroom. I've got some cool stuff here and there, especially my Chameleon, Lyone, that I have hanging out right by my bedside. He really does nothing but exist half the day and eat, which oddly reminds me of Zion.

And that brings me back to mom.

It's not like she's never done anything compassionate in her whole life. I could be quite judgemental at times, that is true, but with my mom, I am almost always right.

Yet, I still managed to be wrong about that girl. Yet, she left and I stayed back.

Like always, I stay back.

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