End Of Me -Matt Sturniolo-

Chapter 12

The touch of the cold empty sheets curiously wake me up. I open my eyes and glance around the room.

I check the time. 5:46 am.

Where the hell is he?

I get out of bed and throw a jacket on before I leave the room to search around the house for him.

I check Nick and Chris' room to see two sleeping bodies, neither of them being him.

No way he's in Ash and Eriss' room so I go down the stairs and to the living room.

My eyebrows furrow at the sight of the empty room but instantly soften at the sight of him sitting outside on the porch steps looking at the ocean. I quietly open the doors and step outside.

"Matt?" I whisper as I walk up to him.

He turns around and squints his eyes at the sight of me.

"What are you doing out here?" He asks me.

"I was gonna ask the same thing" I smile as I sit next to him.

"I woke up and couldn't get back to sleep" He shrugs.

"No wonder, you fell asleep at like 7pm" I quietly laugh.

Theres a moment of silence of him and I both thinking about what to say next.

"Are you okay?" I whisper, breaking the silence.

"Yeah I'm okay, why?" He asks as he furrows his eyebrows.

"I don't know you've just seemed off since we went to the beach" I say as he looks away from me and fixates his gaze on the crashing waves. "Come on Matt whats wrong? You can talk to me" I place me hand on his shoulder.

His eyes go from the waves to the touch of my hand. I can see in his eyes he is really thinking about what to say next.

He stays silent and I notice his eyes becoming glossy.

"Matt I'm right here, listen to me right now. Whenever you're sad, I want to hear why. I want to know what you're feeling, all the time so I can share those feelings with you" My voice grows soft as the world around us goes quiet.

I have to shy away from the emotions in his eyes because my heart his hurting knowing his is too.

Another pause of silence goes by before I break it again.

"Do you want me to leave?" I ask.

"No" He says almost too quickly. "No"

I lean back just a little. "Tell me whats wrong then" I say desperately. "Tell me how to make you feel better" I whisper "Tell me what to do and I'll do it."

"That guy at the beach, I don't know what it was but the way he looked at you and smiled at you made me physically ill. He doesn't deserve your sympathy and you deserve far better" He pauses and takes a deep breath before continuing. "You deserve someone who loves you with every single beat of his heart, someone who thinks about you constantly, someone who spends every minute of everyday just wondering what you're doing, where you are, who you're with and if you're okay. You need someone who will treat you with respect."

"Where is this coming from?" I whisper.

"I don't know but I feel like I've wanted to say all that for a while. Since you met whatever the fuck his name is.  but I didn't even think it over, it just came out" He shugs his shoulders with a confused look on his face.

"Do you feel better?" I ask him. He doesn't seem sad or anxious anymore.

"When I talk to you, yeah I do" He locks eyes with me.