Against all odds

Chapter 42

I got woken up the next morning by the hotel room phone ringing on the bedside table.

I grumpily asked: Hello?

Good morning, Miss Duman. Marlene from reception speaking Im sorry for the disturbance but theres this gentleman here that insists on speaking with you. Would you like us to send him away?

Who does he say he is? I asked confusedly.

He said his name was Max.

Any last name?

No unfortunately. He said youll know who it is if I refer to him as Maximus? Does that mean anything to you? she asked.

Yeah, what does he want?

No sir you cant just- there was some rustling on the other side.

Alex, please. Just let me come up there or get down here. I need to talk to you. I heard Maxs voice through the speaker.

What do you want? I asked slightly angry.

To talk to you, I need to apologize, and I want to do it in person.

Ugh-. I sighed.

Ill buy you breakfast? he asked hopefully.

Room 319. I need to get ready first. You better bring coffee when you come up here. I said, Now give the phone back and apologize to the lady. I already forgot her name, but she sounded nice.

See you then. He said a smile evident in his voice.

And he held his promise. 10 minutes later he knocked at my door with two cups of coffee and a doughnut in hand.

I brought some sugar as well. Forgive me?

Yeah, youll need to do much better than that little forgive me. You fucking snooped in my business. I dont need your help! Im handling the situation well on my own. I huffed angrily about to close the door again.

Let me in please?

Fine but only because you have coffee. I sneered closing the door behind him.

Look, I know I shouldnt have looked through your contract stuff, but I needed to do something! They just cant throw you out like that! They need a valid reason, and your behaviour isnt one. I asked the lawyer it isnt, they cant pull out.

Well, I asked a lawyer too and a title sponsor pulling out because of something I caused is a valid reason. Now I know you are angry at me and think Im stupid but contrary to your judgement Im not. Now either you give me a better reason as to why you snooped, or you leave because I have no interest in spending my time with someone who cant respect my privacy when I havent even had a cup of coffee.

Alex. Please, Im really sorry. I know that doesnt help but you helped me so much after Silverstone and you helped Daniel with his confidence, and I feel like you always help everyone, so I wanted to help you in return. I realize now this was the wrong way and I regret doing it, but you cant always be the one helping anyone. You need help too. Especially now when you dont have the team supporting you anymore. So please forgive me. he begged.

I sighed deeply: I already did. Thanks for trying but please leave it be now. Ill be gone after the final debrief next Monday anyways and youll probably never hear from me again. And Im sorry too. For freaking out on you yesterday.

No worries. You will be back for next year. Or the year after. You have to show them what they lost! Please dont give up now. He begged.

Im not. Im just coming to terms with the fact that these few races were the peak of my career. Theres no place for women on the grid. You heard them say it multiple times. I was just too stubborn to realize it. I shrugged while I kept packing my suitcase.

Oh, now youre talking shit. You deserve this seat more than anyone else on the grid!

Yeah right. I said sarcastically.

No, you do! I dont know if anyone else could have managed to perform as good as you did with little to no preparation. You fucking won your first ever race!

Max. theres no need to tell me that. I know my performance was good. But its out of my control what happens next. I dont know when the news will come out but at this time of the season the other teams are already picking their drivers or have already signed them so theres no use to get my hopes up only to be disappointed again. If you would excuse me now, I need to check out and catch a taxi. I said zipping my suitcase before taking a last look around the room and pulling my stuff out of the room.

Ill drive you.

Max. I appreciate it, but I think I can make it to the airport on my own.

I know you can, but I want to send you off.

2 minutes into the journey I sighed absentmindedly.

What are you thinking about? Max asked curiously.

Havent told my family about it yet. I murmured, The situations complicated you know?

He patiently waited for me to continue.

Ever since my dad died, mum hasnt been the healthiest. Mentally I mean. She never got over him dying so early and being alone with four kids. She took it really hard. We stayed with our grandparents a lot because she couldn't look at us and a year after he died, she went away for the first time. Got a new fling and all. Well, she has these flings for two to four weeks and then shes back home and cries about them just to go back out and get another one a few weeks later. My siblings and I were fine at our grandparents house but as time went on and they got older Chris, my twin brother, and I started to take more and more responsibility when my grandpa died. Grandma has Alzheimers and when we couldnt do it anymore, we had to put her in a home. The money I got from racing was the main provider for my family. Mum never really supported my dream of being a driver. My dad did though. He was always there, my personal mechanic and coach and stuff. Mama wanted me to be a doctor or a lawyer or something like that. I would have never started Uni if it wasnt for her. The thing is if I dont have racing. Sure, well have enough money for some time, but I need to find another stable seat or a job because the money I get from terminating early is only gonna last so long. And we need to find a solution or else- Anyways, Im rambling.

Alex. I didnt know-.. Max whispered.

I know. No one knows, except Mick, of course, I hope he isnt too mad about it. I feel like everyone thinks Formula1 drivers have rich families and money has no real worth to them, so I dont blame you for thinking that.

Wheres your mum now? he asked softly.

I have no idea to be honest. I dont even know if shell show up on Monday. I snorted.

Show up where?

To my graduation. I thought you knew that already! I smiled softly.

I didnt. I hope it goes well for you. Have you opened the e-mail yet?

No. I was too exhausted yesterday and didnt have time today so still in my inbox.

You should open it now. The e-mail I mean. He said pulling into a parking spot.

Why? Ill just do it later.

What are you scared? he teased.

Im not!

Sound like it to me. he kept taunting.

Youre seeing things Max.

Yeah, yeah.

You know what. Fine. Ill open it. I said taking a deep breath and opening my inbox. I didnt even notice my hands were shaking. I ignored the voices in my head telling me I didnt make it and clicked on the right e-mail.