I can't stop me - Richarlison de Andrade x reader

IX

I put both of my hands on either side of his waist and lifted him up as gently as I could. He was quite heavy, of course, but I managed to get him up the stairs, changing my hand placement multiple times on the way. Once I got to his bedroom, I kind of dragged him to his bed. He was a little too heavy for me to keep on carrying him. I didn't want to make him uncomfortable once he wakes up but I couldn't let him go to sleep in those same clothes, his shirt was wet and smelled like alcohol. He probably spilled it while drinking. I went over to his closet, picked out a different shirt and pyjama trousers before I changed him in them.

I tucked him into bed making sure he was warm and kissed his forehead before I made my way out of the room. I walked down the stairs and the first thing I did was lock the door. He could have gotten into some real shit if he kept the door unlocked like that. After that, I walked over to the kitchen counter and started putting the lids on the different bottles he had opened. For a second I was thinking about how much he had drank because I can clearly remember at least some of these were almost full last night. When I put the bottles back in the cupboard I put my hand on the kitchen counter to lean against it and felt only relief once I realized there was liquid pretty much all over it. At least he spilled some so he didn't drink that much. That kind of made me feel better once I was done cleaning up. I poured myself a glass of water and just stood still for a moment, thinking about all that happened today. I snapped out of my thoughts and walked back upstairs.

I walked into his room and sat down on the bed looking at him. I have no idea what to do, if he wakes up and I'm still here he might think I'm trying to push things on him or I'm doing too much but I don't want to go. I figured I'd lay down for a second and then leave. I layed down besides him and put one of my hands on his back carefully before he pulled me in. That took me by suprise, I thought he was passed out. But it's not like I didn't like it. For a second I had that feeling of being safe with our arms interwined, just like last night. And I felt that affirmation from him that I had been craving since the end of training. I didn't want to let go of this moment and by the way he pulled me in it seemed like he didn't want to either but I didn't want to make him even more upset. I know he'd be pissed to see me in the morning. I tried pulling away for a bit.

"Stay, don't go."
He slurred out. I'm sure it's the alcohol. If he was sober he would want me on my way back to my house as soon as possible. But I just can't say no to him.

I don't know why he drank but I'm pretty sure he did it for the comfort. To forget about what had happened earlier. I do want to go and not dissapoint both of us even more but if comfort was what he wanted, at least I can give it to him. Even for just a couple of hours.

I felt him toss and turn in his sleep a couple of times and I went along with his positions, wanting to make him feel as comfortable as possible. I'm pretty sure I couldn't fall asleep for a couple of hours while thinking about everything but I can't remember. It's all kind of blurry from last night.

I woke up before him once again but this time our roles were switched, my arms were wrapped around him. For a couple of hours what happened wasn't occupying my head but as soon as I woke up I remembered all about it and once again I couldn't forget about it either. He'll probably be mad at me. I know he pulled me in but I had every chance to resist and walk away knowing it's best for both of us right now. Mostly him, though. Yet another mistake I made and yet another thing to burden me all day again.

I felt him turning to a different side again and he turned to face me, except his eyes were open. I jumped just a little, that definately took me by suprise. I immediately turned to the other side and got out of bed as fast as I could. He sat up to look at me trying to find my phone somewhere around his room. I wasn't really looking for it. I know it's on the nighstand on the side I was sleeping on but I didn't want to just walk out and I didn't really know what to say to him either.