Our musical / Satosugu

-7-

Very big TW for this chapter again‼️⚠️

Third person POV
Gojo let Geto go, unable to put his finger on what had happened. Now that he thought of it, he noticed that he actually didn't know anything about the raven-haired at all. He came to understand that they haven't known each other for a long time, that all his feelings were useless and inappropriate, every thought that he wasted on him was completely irrelevant. He didn't know Geto at all and it bothered him, he wanted to get to know Geto. He wanted their friendship to grow and wanted to make him happy. Gojo himself didn't understand those feelings towards the raven-haired. He thought of them as friendship-like feelings when you want to become someone's friend. But little did he know, there was something else behind all that.

Geto couldn't help but go to his and Mahito's dorm to grab something that was sharp enough. He entered the dorm with a bit of hesitation, not wanting to run into Mahito again. Before entering, he put his ear against the door, trying to listen to whatever Mahito was doing, if he was in the dorm. But to Geto's luck, there was no one to be heard or found in there. He threw his things on the ground and rushed to the bathroom. He shut the door behind him and locked it so that if Mahito was to come to the dorm he wouldn't catch him.
He looked in the mirror with disgust written all over his face and murmured something no one could've heard. The only thing you could clearly hear was the music blasting from Geto's headphones in an attempt to calm himself. He sat down on the floor, razor blade already in his hand, but shaking way too hard to do anything with it.
Silent tears were running down his cheeks and anger began to rise within him. Geto threw the blade against the wall and started to have a panic attack. He began pulling his hair in order to calm down. He knew it was still a form of self-harm but better than cutting right? He turned down the volume of his music a bit and tried to take deep breaths. Geto was still shaking very hard but he managed to calm down quite a bit. He leaned his head against the wall and closed his eyes listening to the music and switching to the next song.

(just pretend that Gojo sang this pls🧌)

Geto's eyes automatically opened again, realizing that this voice sounded very familiar.

No. No that can't be.

He closed his eyes back again and listened to the song play. He didn't understand a word but he felt like the song matched the current situation. The feelings the song was sung with gave him goosebumps and calmed him even further. Geto stopped shaking and his breathing was back to normal again. He stood up and grabbed his phone from somewhere on the floor.
He froze.
The song really was sung by Satoru Gojo. He sighed and took a deep breath in, holding it for a few seconds before exhaling again. He hated himself for how he treated Gojo just now, even though Geto knew that the white-haired would understand if he explained everything to him. However, Geto mentally couldn't possibly tell Gojo about Mahito's doings. They didn't know each other for that long enough. 

Geto got to his room, grabbed some clothes, and went back to the bathroom to take a shower. He felt so uncomfortable in his body that he wanted to pull off his own skin but somehow managed to get his mind off of it. He showered with straight cold water, which made him want to get out quickly and put on some cozy clothes.
As soon as he finished he went out to look for Gojo. Others wouldn't go out for maybe days but Geto was already kind of used to this, so he learned to handle it.
Geto went up to the highest floor of the uni building, starting to look from top to bottom to not miss the white-haired. He looked left and right and even asked some people about his whereabouts but to his dismay, no one knew where he was. Finally, he came to the first floor and was met by Gojo's cousin, and asked him if he knew where Gojo was.

„He told me he went with Yuji and Aoi to their kickboxing studio not too far from here. Let me write the directions for you."

Geto really appreciated the younger one's help and went straight to the directions which Yuta had written down on a little piece of paper for him. The worry for the white-haired that had built up before, completely disappeared as he saw the mentioned studio from afar. Geto hurried there, basically running to get this apology off of his chest as soon as possible, because if he didn't, he might have another breakdown.

He stopped.
Right in front of the door.

Does he want to apologize because he regrets what he said? Because he hurt Gojo's feelings?

Or does he want to apologize out of self-interest? To make himself feel better?

Geto was confused and just stood there, in front of the door, deep in thought. He knew what he was thinking was ridiculous but he couldn't help it. At last, he shook his head, clearing his thoughts, and opened the door. The air he was met with was very thick and reeked of sweat. He looked around, was met with many looks of interest, and at first didn't spot Gojo. Geto walked around, looked left and right, and finally saw Gojo at the punching bags. The white-haired was covered in sweat and threw his punches as if there was no tomorrow. Geto wanted to go back, suddenly feeling an odd nervousness growing within him. But he still went up to Gojo, tapped him lightly on the shoulder from behind :

"Do you have a minute?"

NOTE
God, I wrote so damn long on this. I got distracted by so many things and didn't get to finish this chapter but now I'm done. I hope you all like it and if you see any errors please tell me🧌