Choice is mine

A small visit

He was tired, that's all. He didn't know the question. The next day I skip breakfast and sit in the end of my bed and play with the quilt in my hands.
As Paul awoke he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his chest.
"Are you alright my love?"
I look at him and flip my gaze from one eye to the other. "Yes, but, the cullens brought you this"
I hold out a letter than I found on my windowsill.
It's hand written and I know he can smell the vampire scent on the grainy paper.

He flips it open and scotches to sit up.
"They want me to meet with them" I look at him and quickly look away to avoid all eye contact. "I need to go eat" I say walking out. I can hear from the kitchen through the thin walls Paul reading the letter outloud to himself. I finish cutting my bagel when he storms in. "What the fuck is this"
I read it, a note to organize a meeting.
I look up at his and his nostrils flare.
"We will not. Be going" he goes to walk back into his bedroom but I grab his shoulder.

"Yes we will, it's just Carlisle, you and me. No one will hurt us" my voice becomes softer with each word.
"How do you know that" he grunts and breaths heavily. I can feel his skin heating up from just where I'm standing. So I wait a minute until I know he has calmed down. "Your going to have to trust me paul, please I need this from you" he sighs and takes my hand and placed it on my cheek. I force a smile but I know, this meeting with me most difficult for me.

I quickly get ready to go and we walk out the door, because the note said to meet there the second we could. Vampires don't sleep so I'm assuming he has been at the river all night. I hope he has eaten, his hunger will not be helpful.

We walk there,hand in hand. My palms sweat both from his body heat and my nerves. We get there and instantly I see his bright blonde hair. But with my luck, he hasn't eaten, and in the day light. He looks far more sickly than ever. My heart skips a beat. Carlisle walks closer, he stands at the edge of his territory and I go to stop at ours but paul crosses, Carlisle's posture stiffens but doesn't shake. I'm assuming he didn't expect it.

He nods to Paul and smiles a warm smile at me. I smile and return the gesture and I clear my throat to interrupt the awkward silence. I stare at Carlisle giving him the gesture to start the conversation.

"Paul, it's an honor to get to know you, me and my family are so glad-" Paul interrupts him rudely.
"What is this meeting called for, there is things I should actually be doing to be productive around my pack. "Paul...please" I look up at him and squeeze his hand. "Just let him talk"

Carlisle clears his throat, even though he doesn't need to, I think him being around humans so much has made him adapt some habits. "Paul this might be hard to understand, and you can take all the time you need to process this information" Paul doesn't budge. But my back stiffens and I lick my lips from the dry morning air.

"But I think, from what I've learned so far, is that Mackenzie is my... mate" my heart rate significantly increases and Paul's body heat gets so intense I pull my hand back and step back. "What" Paul says gruffly under his breath.

"I can't eat, if I was a human I can't sleep, I'm dying. My heart hurts when I can't see her" Carlisle starts to reason. "I need you" Carlisle's eyes flicker to me and drill into me. His eyes are wide and his perfect posture now gone. "I was hoping we could create an agreement-"

"You selfish bloodsucker" Paul starts. I look at him in surprise. "You want to take the one thing in this world that means something to me and keep it for yourself" Pauls skin is making the water at his feet boil. "No I-" Carlisle starts but cannot finish.
"You know she doesn't live forever right? So even if! Even if you killed me and took her away from me, you have limited years to be with her. Your a selfish bastard"

I knew I wouldn't live forever, but it wasn't something I liked to think about. It hurt to know that my existence would end and everyone around me, that could live forever would have to see me old, ugly and rotten away"

Carlisle begins another end.
"This meeting wasn't to make a confession it was to organize something that you, have little to no control over." I don't look at Paul. Even though I can feel his eyes starring straight into the side of my head.
"I wanted to propose that I will turn her into a vampire and we could either, move you in to our house and live....polyamorously or  her walking back weekly-"

"She isn't a fucking child of divorce and neither will be turned into one of you"
"Paul I think me becoming a vampire would be beneficial" I say. Finally turning to him I touch my hand to his arm and he nudged it away. My heart breaks and Carlisle saw it.

"Your not becoming a vampire and that is final" he yells into my face. He looks at me, then at Carlisle and starts to storm into the woods but quickly turns into a wolf and start to run. I turn to Carlisle and I walk closer. He doesn't hesitate to pull me in and hug me. It's not that it was wrong. Or uncomfortable but I needed to see his face.

"Carlisle, meet me here tonight, midnight sharp. I'll be here. And I want you to turn me"
"I will have to bring you to the volturi"
I nod and pull a stray string off his shirt.
"Then so be it"