Bucky had told Nic he was going to take Lani home. He'd called a cab for them to take them to Lani's apartment. She'd been in a daze from the time the left the hospital to arriving at her apartment, apart from when he had to ask her for her address multiple times.
He walked her upstairs and entered her small studio apartment.
He took a second to look around loft. It was dark and messy. He didn't think from meeting her that she lived like this, thought she was a doctor she was busy.
He had her sit down on her bed before deciding what to do next.
" How about you shower? I'll get some clothes for you." Bucky began running around her apartment searching for something clean for her to wear.
Bucky turned back to see she hadn't moved.
" Come on, you'll feel better after a shower." Bucky whispered to her after leaning down to meet her eye-line.
Lani stared down at her hands.
" I didn't mean it." Lani shook her head as she looked at him.
" I know you didn't."
" I tried to help her-"
" You did help her. Now let me help you, okay?"
Lani nodded.
Bucky helped her into the bathroom. He turned the shower on before grabbing a towel.
" Here's a towel okay? If you need anything just call, i'll be right out here."
" Please, don't leave me Bucky." Lani said as she grabbed onto his arm.
" You want me to join you?"
" I don't wanna be alone."
" Okay. Okay." Bucky said pausing before helping her take her shirt off.
" You need help with these?" Bucky asked her and she nodded. He pulled her pants down while looking up at her as she held onto his shoulders while stepping out of them.
He helped her into the shower before taking his own clothes off and joining her.
She was facing the shower head with both her hands on her chest. Bucky gently took her hands from her chest and held them under the water. He rubbed his own fingers between hers allowing the dried blood to wash off.
She watched as the blood disappeared from her fingers before turning to him.
She paused when she noticed the scarring on his shoulder where his metal arm connected to his body.
She reached her hand up touching it gently.
" We're both pretty fucked up, huh?" She asked.
" Guess we kind of even each other out." Bucky responded.
Lani smiled.
" Sometimes I wish I was never born." She told him.
" Well, i'm glad you were."
" I think your the only person who I feel like I can be nobody but somebody at the same time with."
" You make me feel like a person. With you I don't feel like Bucky, the winter soldier or the white wolf. I just feel like me." Bucky told her.
" So your not Bucky?" She asked him.
" Bucky was a charmer. He was the guy who could make a room laugh. I don't know who I am."
" Your the guy who can take a bullet to the shoulder and walk around like nothing happened. Your the guy who is a 106 years old who rides a motorcycle and owns a small white cat. You may not be Bucky but your someone. Especially to me."
Bucky ran out his hand on her cheek.
" That why you go by Lani and not Kallie anymore?"
" Kallie was the girl whose father beat her everyday, who was scared to walk past the room he was in. Lani, is a doctor. Who saves people everyday."
" That's right. Everyday." He responded.
They'd gotten out of the shower a while later and were laying in Lani's bed.
" What about James?"
" Reminds me when my grandmother would give out to me as a kid." Bucky laughed which made Lani smile.
" I know." Lani grinned sitting up and looking down at him.
" Jamie." She smiled.
" Jamie?"
" Yeah! Your so a Jamie."
He laughed as she lay beside him.
" Jamie."
" Lani and Jamie." Lani muttered.
" I like it."
Lani smiled.
" How are you feeling?" He asked her.
" Can we just keep talking about you?"
" Okay." Jamie replied.
They both then formed a list of things 'Jamie' was liked and things he knew he disliked. And things he was willing to try.
Jamie realised that Lani was living through him. Him telling her about his life was a coping mechanism for her. And he became okay with that.
