Kalani Knight never thought she'd live on this earth without her brother. She had never existed without him, yes she lived without him but he was somewhere else alive. Now he wasn't.
Her brother was murdered because of her, and no amount of surgery would repent for that.
Lani woke up the next day in a strange bed. She sat up as Jamie walked into the room. The minimalistic room made her feel safe and seeing him made her feel safer.
" Hey." He muttered as he walked over to the bed and sat on the edge.
She was scared to speak.
" Is he?"
Jamie looked down before nodding.
Lani pulled her limbs to herself. Her knees to her chest and her hands to her knees holding herself.
" You did everything you could, Kalani."
Lani looked at her hands as she noticed the blood in her mothers ring. Blood that mustn't of washed off. When did she wash the blood off?
" He asked me to stop-"
" Hey, hey. It's okay."
" No it's not. Nic done so much for me and I did nothing for him."
" That's not true."
Lani looked at him.
" Oh god, Julia. Lana oh fucking christ." Lani said as she stood up from the bed and began leaning over in defeat.
" The cops went there last night to tell them."
" I- I have- I have to go."
" Kalani-"
" My brother has just been murdered. His wife is alone and so is his daughter. I need to be with them."
" Okay. We can go."
" We? There is no we Jamie. You're just a guy who loved me, nothing more. This has nothing to do with you."
" I want to be there for you."
" No, you can't. You can't." Lani said before rushing out.
Lani rushed herself to Nic's house running in the door but she stopped when she seen a tired Julia sitting at the kitchen table with a mug in front of her.
Julia was still in her pajama's and her hair still wrapped.
She turned to look at Lani, but Lani couldn't read her.
Lani walked towards her.
" He was the love of my life. The father of my children." Julia smiled as she spoke.
" And he was killed in cold blood. He didn't deserve that." She shook her head.
" I'm so sorry, Jules. I tried- It's all my fault."
Julia grabbed her hand.
" Your brother loved you so much, Kalani. I know he'd be glad to die for you."
" I didn't want it to be this way." Lani shook her head as she looked down at her.
" No one did. But it is. And we have to learn to live with that, for Alana and for ourselves."
Lani nodded.
" Does she know?"
" She's still asleep."
Lani's heart broke at the thought of her niece having to grow up without her father.
" Mama?" Lani turned around to see Lana beside the staircase rubbing her eyes.
" Hi baby." Jules smiled as her daughter walked over to her and she picked her up.
" I'll- uhm- let you." Lani decided to leave not being able to bear it.
Lani looked down at her niece and rubbed her hair.
She smiled taking in the little girls face and emotion, knowing that her life was about to be destroyed.
" Bye Lans."
" Bye NiNi."
Lani left her brothers home as his wife and daughter wept for him.
Lani headed straight to the hospital, as she made her way to the attendings lounge everyone stared at her but she ignored them.
She grabbed a pair of scrubs before Will walked up to her.
" Kalani, what are you doing here?"
" I'm here to check on my patients, what do you think?" She snapped back.
" You shouldn't be here..."
" Why because my brother was just killed? Because I held him in my arms for hours! Because no matter how much I begged for someone anyone to help me save him they didn't and they just sat and watched him die! Don't tell me where I shouldn't be, the only place I shouldn't of been was with my brother at deaths door." Lani pushed past him when the Chief came towards her.
" Knight." Lani stopped and laughed.
" Fuck you." Lani looked around the room full of people doctors, nurses, patients, police officers.
" Fuck all of you! My brother is dead! He's gone."
Everyone stared.
" Knight, I'm taking away your privileges."
" You can't give my case to him, he'll kill all three of my patients!"
" Dr Halstead is capable."
" Dr Halstead isnt capable of shit! Chief, if you take this from me now, I am done. This is all I have." Lani shook her head begging.
" I'm sorry, Knight. Your unfit."
Lani stared at her before turning to Halstead.
" Go to hell." She said before pushing past him throwing the scrubs she held to the ground.
