Mine BxB

Chapter 10: Play with my heart.

Once we got home, I just laid in bed staring up at the ceiling as I thought about what he meant by his words... I made the choice so I wouldn't regret it! If... I didn't get teased, I wouldn't feel weird things. I thought about how he held me, the feeling of him on top of me and the way his eyes softened as he looked at me, so unlike his usual cold stare... I won't be seeing that again, huh? The thought made my heart tighten and my lips quiver. 

He wasn't doing it for me, he was just teasing. I have no superiority complex to think I'm special. I'm a solid 6/10 and have a wonky personality, so I don't have any delusions about my extremely hot and rich boss, the man who has dated celebrities and has Brad Pitt, Taylor Swift and a few others as celebrity spokespersons. He literally rejected invites to huge events like Met Gala, I know this because I'm the one that RSVPed no. I know my heart wants me to believe that I'm special to this man, but I'm not. I'm not going to be a rich bitch's boy toy.

I did the right thing.

Are you sure? 

I didn't reply to that thought like I usually would because no, I was not sure, I didn't know what his touch and his gaze meant. I've never felt what he makes me feel but I don't want to feel them! I... I can't be that vulnerable. I slowly drifted off to sleep that night, restless and filled with weird emotions. 

I woke up the next day with Meg jumping on my bed to wake me up, she was excited about Celest coming over and I helped her set the living room up for the movie night. We drowned the couch in pillows and added fairy lights. I told meg I'd stay for all the Rush Hour films but will let them... have their date for the rest of the movies. She blushed and gave me a big hug, saying thanks under her breath. 

The day went well, the girls had fun and were annoyingly cute with each other. I did the big brother thing and make puking noises every time they said something nauseatingly cute.

"Addy stop! You're embarrassing me!" Meg yelled as I made kissy faces with my hands at them and then pretended like I was dying from looking at them.

"That's the point!" I gleamed at the embarrassment I was causing her, my job as a guardian was going very well. Celest just giggled at the blush forming on Meg's face and gave her cheek a cute kiss. I again pretended to throw up and excused myself saying, they were nauseating.

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The rest of the weekend passed in a blur, I tried to keep he who shall not be named out of my bloody mind, but he would sneak in at the most inopportune times. I was trying my best to push him out of my mind but his voice, his touch, and the way his lips felt on my skin made me tremble just thinking about it. I tried to do my chores on autopilot but it wasn't working. He looked so... angry and I don't know... hurt? when I talked to him about... the thing. I spent the rest of the day blasting music and drinking a cherry-flavoured wine, don't ask. 

"CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES 

THIS IS MY LAST RESORT!

SUFFOCATION! NO FEELINGS!

DON'T GIVE A FUCK IF I CUT MY ARMS BLEEDING

THIS IS MY LA-"

I smacked the alarm shut, groaning in pain from the stupid hangover. I may have had too much to drink but it helped me forget what I needed to at least. I rolled out with another pained groan and grabbed two Tylenol from my side table, chugging them down with some water. I sat there for a few minutes as the headache began to subside, and I realised that I was going to have to face Mr Rovere today. I whined and pulled up my phone, staring at it in dismay.