Just a Taste // HS Blurbs

Let me in^

warning: implied cheating (in a sense?) angst angst angst

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"If y'let me in, I'm ready to give you what I couldn't before."

He wrung his hands as he stood in front of her door. His stomach a mess of anxiety, sweat on his brow, he had realized just how badly he fucked up when her face barely moved. Stoic. This wasn't his Y/N.

It had started off as simply fuck buddies. Friends with benefits. And it progressed through the months. They did things that friends with benefits shouldn't. Snuggles and kisses and sweet nothing. Picnics and movie dates and private fluff that really had her believing that they were more than just random fucks.

Harry had wanted to have his cake and eat it too. When Y/N had opened up his phone to some sexting going on back and forth between Harry and some sorority girl, she felt her heart shatter. Seeing him talk about it wanting to taste someone else and wanting to see how tight she was, making plans to see her the day Y/N was going out of town... it had utterly wrecked her.

When confronted, Harry panicked. They had never claimed exclusivity but everything had hinted at it. His idea was that when she was away, he could play a bit and come back to have the soft snuggles and hot sex with her. There was nothing wrong with tasting a few more things, right? I didn't matter that his stomach didn't felt right doing it.

His mates had been on his back about the fact he wasn't dating her and also not taking advantage of being in college. They'd gotten to his head, and he was set up with Stacey and she was good looking, decent enough. She was willing and eager and They'd texted back and forth, Harry not thinking twice about leaving his phone in the bed with Y/N as he went to the bathroom.

When she opened his phone with the few dings it had, she felt like she could throw up.

S: I can't wait until you come over. I haven't been fucked in agesssss.

H: honestly? I've had my eye on you for a while.

S: I got a set I think you may like. You said you liked red, right? ;)

Attached was a photo of a toned body in a red lace outfit, nipples able to be seen and a bare bottom with a hand covering her cunt.

S: if you can find some time to come sooner... I'll be waiting. Xxxx

Y/N felt like she couldn't breathe. Hand shaking slightly as she stood up, grabbing her clothes and hastily putting them on. She was so fucking stupid. So dumb. Harry was like everyone else. And it was her fault for letting this go on as much as it did.

Harry's brows furrowed as he walked out of the bathroom to see her hastily getting dressed, tears streaming down her face. His heart broke, hating seeing her any type of upset. It was instinct, rushing to grab her and pull her into his body.

"Baby... wha's happened? What's the mat-" he was interrupted by a shove, loosing his balance and falling on to the bed.

"What's the matter? I'm.... Please, don't touch me." She said quietly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to shove you. But this... it isn't going to work anymore Harry. I obviously was thinking it was more than this was, and that's my fault. You stated your opinions and wants and I was fine with that at the time-" her voice cracked, and Harry's stomach dropped. What was she talking about? She couldn't know....

"Your texts. You've got a lovely girl named Stacey who has a nice set for you to see when y'go over on the day I leave to go back home for a day." The bitterness was tasted even on Harry's tongue, his throat feeling thick as he stood up. She wasn't supposed to see those.

Shit. Shit. Why did he feel like this, like he had cheated when they weren't anything? Why did he feel like he wanted to get sick and cry?

"We-we arent exclusive! We aren't and y'said that was fine, we aren't." He sputtered out, making it worse. Her face dropped and her eyes hit the ground, the silence broken by a sniffle.

"Yeah. We aren't, I guess. I dunno... when it's a few months in and you do all those... dates, and y'introduce me to your mum and sister and have me come out every night and call me your girl... it all seemed like more. Everyone keeps askin' me how long we've been dating and I suppose I'm an idiot for saying a few months when.... I jumped the gun and believed that everything you said... that I'm the most beautiful girl and you're so lucky to have me, that I'm the best you've ever had.... It's easy to believe it when you must have so much practice saying it." She laughed bitterly, throwing her shoes on her feet, throwing Harry's shirt off and pulling on her own.

It felt like he got punched in the stomach. Realizing how badly he had fucked up, bur his ego wasn't allowing him to admit it. The technicalities saved him, Didnt they?

"I don't know what you want me to say." He said though the tears burned behind his eyes. He refused to show how it was effecting him. Instead of being hit, shoved again, yelled at, she just nodded, shocking him.

"Yeah. I don't know... I thought... was living in a fantasy land. You were giving me what I wanted but it's obvious now that you were playing a game. You can't actually give me what I want. I wanted to be with you." She pushed the hair out of her face, Harry helplessly sitting on the bed as she gathered her things. The panic was setting in but he didn't dare make a noise about how the makeup wipes being thrown into her bag tore him apart. She was leaving, leaving.

"We don't have to- we don't hav'ta stop, Y/N. Why?" He knew he sounded stupid when her head snapped to him, irritation covering her face.

"I know that my pussy is apparently too good and you continued this whole charade to keep it, but you can't give me what I want. I want a boyfriend. I want someone to love me and give me those forehead kisses and say those beautiful things you said to me and mean them. You can't give me that, can you?" The last piece of hope had shattered when he stayed silent, the silence staying around until she slammed the door shut and walked out of his life.

It hasn't been too long since then, and he knew immediately that he was fucked up. His texts and called remained ignored and unopened. Her friends had told him to fuck off, and he understood. Mitch had smacked him upside the head and he couldn't stomach the looks Sarah and Evie had given him when they'd found out why Y/N wasn't tagging along anymore.

So that's how he ended up outside her apartment door, knocking and speaking through the door. "Please. I'm a fucking idiot, Y/N ... I'm an arrogant son of a bitch and I didn't want to back down but please let me in. I meant ever bring I said to you before then. I haven't fucked anyone else since you. Please let me in." His voice broke, resting his head against the cool wood. "Let me give you what you want."

His breathing caught as he heard the click of the lock.