Not The Same

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My polished boots shone in the wet dirt of the morning.

"Now, now, you know that we wish that we could be here for you, but your sisters need to be occupied. You're a big girl, you've got this." My mom kissed my cheek, and my dad ruffled my hair which I shooed away.
It took me too long with my hair this morning just to mess it up before the function.

I didn't care that my family weren't coming, I didn't care that I forgot to tell them about the matric merchandise and that I didn't have anything to show for my senior year except for a live Facebook video of the senior choir's performance (featuring me in the back row).
I only cared about my results, that's the only reason that I was here.

I walked up to the group, who was already buzzing with excitement. The girls -- Aashvi, Jayda and Mikayla squealed behind masks that matched their uniforms, pulling me into a hug while Aisha stood behind them, filing her already perfect nails.

"Look who finally showed up."
"Solly's been waiting for you for actual hours, bruh."
"So cute how you two are so pathetic for each oth- ow!"
I stood in shock. He was waiting for me?
That's the first time he's ever done that in the five years I've known him.

"Where is he, by the way?" I queried, trying to not sound desperate. The three looked at each other knowingly, pointing at the balcony. Sure enough, there he was, in his shining morning glory, looking straight at me. His eyes were bright and captivating in the sunlight; feeling like sunrise, soft and cold at the same time.
Wait no, stop, I broke it off with him. Get a grip.

Aashvi shoved me forward, waving at Sol who was wearing a sour expression. "Sh - I mean, he's here!"
A-plus for effort, I guess.

He didn't budge from the balcony, a sign that he wanted to talk away from everyone else.
I don't know why he always has this reverse "I'm-the-victim-of-my-consequences-not-you" thing going on.
I don't know why I always fell for it.

I turned around, getting in line for my graduation cap and gown.
I'm not the same guy who falls for weak tricks anymore.

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