two college student friends start fake dating to see how long they can fool a couple's therapist for the shits and giggles. then suddenly the whole school KNOWS LFMAO WHAT LOSERS
generally kinda crack???? a lot of funny stuff but the occasional ANGS...
lowercase intended ;; some sort of crack in here too. first pov C:
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"ahh! you must be y/n and danheng -- come inside my office! sit anywhere you like," the pink-haired lady called from down the corridor, in which danheng and i were sitting together on some chairs by a vending machine.
i smiled brightly and twisted the top of my cheddar goldfish bag, sealing the twist with a spare hairband. but i was probably gonna feast good inside therapy too.
"its time," i sent danheng a knowing look to which he sort of just remained stoic at. but i knew deep down, he was finding some sort of entertainment from this too.
he nodded curtly and we paced together inside our therapist's office.
i held onto his arm along the way. god damn. he's got veins a heroin addict would kill for.
march's office seemed to be more of a cotton candy themed playroom than it was a professional therapy office, but it was cute.
everything here was kind of going to be a joke anyway. danheng and i were not actually a couple.
yet. ;)
i took a little baby pink cloud pillow on my right and held it to my chest. danheng had a small leaf pillow on his lap. i never knew i could be so jealous of inanimate objects. JOKES
"it's so nice to meet you-- i'm march! i have a degree in marriage and couple's counseling. i bought it online with an animal breeding permit too!" she excitedly clapped her gloved hands together.
danheng and i initially thought she was joking, but we both see it proudly displayed on her wall along with a doctor's license using a poorly drawn thumbs up as a seal of authenticity.
she is so me.
"tell me a bit more about yourselves?" she offered graciously.
danheng awkwardly chuckled and took his chance to introduce himself. "i'm danheng," he started very neutrally, but in a polite way. "i'm majoring in cultural astronomy," he concludes.
i noted long ago that danheng was usually very silent in general.
"i'm y/n!!" i gave march a wide grin. "i'm an art major!! so naturally that means i have some sort of unspoken trauma :3! danheng and i aren't married yet but we are about to-- we just want to assure that there's not too many troubles in our relationship."
danheng gave me a slight side eye because of my enthusiastic allusion to trauma.
i misinterpreted it and instead reopened my bag of goldfish and dropped one in his palm. he usually side eyed me whenever he wanted food or something of that sort.
march giggled reassuringly, leaning back in her rolly chair. "love your passionate outlook on childhood trauma! that is the cutest thing about being a therapist, seeing other people delusionally minimize their struggles <3!"
