𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐓: 𝐑. 𝐊𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐂𝐇

𝚒𝚒𝚒

❀ ❀ ❀

"A REQUEL, DUMBASS." Luciana mumbled to herself.

Richie sighed. Luciana was gonna get them exposed if she kept acting like a jealous girlfriend.

"Or a legacyquel. Fans are torn on the terminology." Mindy continued.

"God. Please speak English." Chad sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Okay, remember the Stab movie that came out last year?" Mindy sat up, turning to the group.

"Oh, yeah! The one the Knives Out guy directed, right? I actually really liked that one." Liv said.

"Of course you did, you have terrible taste." Mindy spat at Liv.

Luciana rolled her eyes at Mindy.

"I hate you." Liv glared at Mindy.

Luciana giggled, silently. Richie pinched her knee. Luciana bit her lip. Richie moved his hand away from her leg.

"The point is, the hard-core Stab fans hate it. You go on 4chan and Dreadit, all they're talking about is how Stab 8 pissed on their childhoods. How they crammed in social commentary just to elevate it. How the main character's a Mary Sue." Mindy explained.

"What's a Mary Sue?" Richie questioned.

Luciana smacked Richie over the head.

"Ow!" Richie held the back of his head.

"Rey from the Star Wars sequels, Captain Marvel from the MCU, Supergirl in the DC show..." Luciana listed off, glaring at her boyfriend.

Richie gulped. He was getting his ass kicked later.

"She's got a point..." Chad mumbled.

"What's wrong with elevated horror? I mean, Jordan Peele fucking rules." Amber stated.

"Obviously, but that's not Stab. Real Stab movies are meta slasher whodunits, full stop." Mindy responded.

Sam rolled her eyes.

"Come on, it's just a movie." Sam replied to Mindy.

Luciana looked at Richie then Amber.

"No, it's not. To some people, the original is their favorite thing in the world. The movie that made them love horror. That Mom or Dad showed them when they were ten that bonded them together. And God help anyone, who slightly fucks with that special memory. Who makes a movie they think disrespects it. It sounds like our killer is writing his own version of Stab 8, but doing it as a requel." Mindy explained.

"Which is?" Dewey inquired.

"See, you can't just reboot a franchise from scratch anymore. The fans won't stand for it. Black Christmas, Child's Play, Flatliners, that shit doesn't work. But you can't just do a straight sequel, either. You got to build something new. But not too new, or the Internet goes bug-fucking nuts. It's gotta be part of an ongoing story line, even if the story shouldn't have been ongoing in the first place. New main characters, yes, but supported by and related to legacy characters. Not quite a reboot not quite a sequel. Like the new Halloween, Saw, Terminator, Jurassic Park, Ghostbusters, fuck, even Star Wars! It always, always goes back to the original!" Mindy exclaimed, picking up the Stab DVD.

"Are you telling me that I'm caught in the middle of fan-fucking-fiction?" Sam inquired, angrily.

"Not just in the middle, Sam. You're the star." Mindy sat in front of Sam.

Luciana smirked to herself.

"So, not to put too fine a point on it, but, according to requel rules. Who's next?" Liv asked, looking at everyone.

"Going by the pattern. Whoever it is has to be connected to someone that came before." Mindy replied.

Everyone looked at Dewey.

"I'm starting to regret coming here." Dewey sighed.

"Jesus, my mom was a character in one of them." Wes panicked.

"No one cares about the shitty inferior sequels, Wes. You're safe, with Randy as our uncle though, you and I are probably screwed." Mindy explained looking at Wes then Chad.

"Wait. What?" Chad stuttered.

"Or you're the killer, and this whole what? Elaborate monologue is just to cover your tracks." Richie argued to Mindy.

"I think it's pretty clear, who the killer is at this point." Mindy looked directly at Sam.

"Who?" Sam inquired.

"You." Mindy responded.

Luciana giggled. Sam looked over to Luciana, confused. Richie pinched her knee again. Luciana glared at him. Why was he pinching her every time she was being mean to Sam?

"It makes perfect requel sense." Mindy sassed.

"That actually does make a lot of sense." Chad agreed.

"Yeah." Liv nodded in agreement.

Sam looked over to Dewey. Dewey shrugged. Sam got up to leave.

"Fuck this." Sam stated before leaving.

Richie followed after Sam. Luciana looked at everyone then followed after Richie. When Sam drove Richie looked over to Luciana.

"Wanna hang out for a bit?" Luciana questioned.

Richie bit his lip then nodded.

❀ ❀ ❀

LUCIANA AND RICHIE Made their way to Luciana's bedroom. Each of them peeling a piece of clothing off of each other.

"How are you not pregnant?" Richie chuckled, laying her on the bed.

Luciana stared at him, tilting her head. Richie climbed on top of her, staring down at her.

"I use birth control, genius." Luciana replied, pulling his head back down.

Richie kissed her. Luciana kissed back. The rest was history.