One Last Smile

Entry #13

Entry #13

November 9, 2022

Wednesday is full of woe! That's what they said yet my Wednesday was filled with love. Kyan and I went to Ayala Center together with our friends. I was stuck with Michelle the whole day as I was afraid that people would notice the changes in Kyan and I's behavior towards each other. Even more so, Vaughn was with us. I thought he was occupied.

Two days ago, Kyan made it clear that he felt the same way, only to tell me after that Vaughn made it loud and clear to him that he liked me too at hindi niya inexpect na magugustuhan din ako ni Kyan. I had asked Kyan before about what he was going to do with Vaughn but he didn't say anything.

Now, Timezone was weirdly fun, aside from Vaughn's multiple attempts to get my attention. Michelle, on the other hand, tried to pair me up with Kyan without others noticing her mischievous ideas. I was simply having fun with them after a hectic school day.

When it was time to go home, I excused myself to roam around Ayala for a while, hoping that Kyan would do the same so we could have some alone time, but it wasn't really what I expected. He had gone home together with Vaughn to discuss some orderly matters, not that I do mot respect their positions, but I somehow wished that Vaughn would quit whining at such crucial time.

I was sulking up until seven in the evening and I had decided to go home after eating a strawberry blizzard at Dairy Queen's before my phone rang and an unknown number popped up.

And when I knew who it was—my dear heart—I was enchanted.

_______

I hastily took out my phone from my tote bag and expressed my frustration, "I don't entertain strangers, bye—" but then I was cut off.

"Oh, you don't?" My eyes instantly widened twice as large as it first was after I heard the voice from the other end. "I was hoping to offer my companionship for you tonight but it seemed that miss Dezryl Gaelle Limana does not entertain a mere stranger like me." I chuckled at Kyan's English accent while looking everywhere for him. I couldn't see him at the moment.

"Are you?" I dared to ask, still looking for him.

He shortly replied, "Am I what?". I could feel his presence near me but I couldn't quite find the direction.

"A stranger to me?" I breathed out. When I turned around, I bumped into someone...who happened to be him.

He smiled and then said, "I was going to say turn around but it seemed you have read my mind." He took my arm and locked it with his as we both went back to Timezone. "And to answer your question, I am no stranger."

"What do you wish to play?" He asked when we faced the cashier. He took out two blue bills and single handedly hand it to the cashier. I sighed while I tried to get him away from the line. "Huy, ano ba? Grabe naman, two thousand. Pwede bang dagdagan—joke lang!" Bigla ko siyang inawat nang umiwas siya at babalik sana sa dati naming pwesto. Tinawanan niya lang ako at hinila ko naman siya papalapit sakin.

"Do not flaunt me with your riches. May maaambag naman ako eh..." I complained, trying to sit on a chair. Who wants to be a millionaire theme song was playing before me and I tried to answer correctly as I could but Kyan beat me to it. "Should we have dinner after this?" I sadly shook my head as I waved my phone at him. My freedom ends at 9 pm since my brother would pick me up at that exact hour.

"I wanna try racing and that basketball," bigla niyang sabi kaya lumipat kami kaagad. He was out of place while we raced. I took a video of him racing and his side profile looked cool.He was so good at throwing those balls in the hoop. He even taught me how. Syempre, it was like one of those movies where the guy shows the girl how to play a sport by leaning closer and by holding her hand.

I felt all of that. Yung kaba at yung kasayahan...lahat naramdaman ko nang inilapit niya ang mukha niya sa leeg ko at hinawakan niya ang mga kamay ko. Parang huminto yung takbo ng mundo ko. I found myself falling for him at this moment. Hindi ko napigilang hawakan ang mga pisngi niya. Tumingin naman siya kaagad at humalakhak.

"Pogi, right? Mhiema, ako lang 'to...tsk, you can't concentrate na." He laughed at me before pulling himself to watch me do it on my own. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and waited until I finished the game. "Wag kang ngumiti. Focus lang. Pano pa kaya kung maging tayo na? Her smile will probably reach her ears." I could hear his statement from a distant kaya mas lalo akong napangiti.

"Ano yun? Hindi ko narinig," pabiro kong sabi. Inalok niya ang card at agad kong ginamot bago ibinalik sa kaniya. "Wala," ang tugon niya. Inirapan ko siya at pinaharap siya sa akin.

"You mean to tell me na pakikiligin mo lang ako?" He scoffed at my remark and suddenly, my forehead got flicked. "Ow!" He swung his arm and interlocked it with mine again as we walked out of the area. Then, he motioned, "Of course, I'd court you. But I don't know how exactly. I am gay, even now. And I found myself thinking that my self-identity must confuse us two. How can I love you if I'm gay? Diba? Babalik ako bilang lalaki, but acting masculine isn't my thing."

"And who said to do all of that?"

"Syempre, ako yung lalaki. Kahit baliktarin, ako yun at hindi ikaw." I rolled my eyes at him and slightly pinched his side. I leaned on his shoulder as we continued to walk while he placed his head on top of mine. 

I looked up at him and gave him a pout. "I never required that. I won't ask you to do that, to change yourself. Yes, it did confuse me, multiple times. Yet, I know that your self-identity is important to you and I do not intend to ruin that." He smiled at me before flicking my forehead once again. "Ano naman kung bakla ka diba? Gusto nga kita, kulet mo. Pektusan kaya kita."

"And I like you too, Dezryl, more than you know."