The Sabrina Series: Hearst On The Line

8. It's Not Over

"I love you Perth!" I yelled into the mic at the end of my set.

The boys and I had spent close to four weeks on the road now. In some cases, we had to fly to our venues.

However, that was not always the case. Sometimes we were driven through the night to towns in the interior. I found myself writing new music as the bus trundled to our next venue.

As it was, Zayn went ahead to tell Siva that we got intimate. Siva did not take it too kindly. He fell off the social media grid. Then he called me and told me what Zayn said.

"Siva, that was before you and I got together!" I said down the line in surprise and anger.

"It still does not change the fact that you and him had sex."

"We did no..."

"Shut up Sabrina!" then he hang up. Soon after that, he fell off the grid completely.

I have never been more heartbroken than I was that time. I kept it in, crying myself to sleep every night. In the morning, I found myself had pressed to explain how I got my eyes swollen.

"It must be my allergies," I replied every morning.

Eventually, I resorted to quiet bbreakfasts and music. I borrowed Clifford and the rest of the guys some of their CDs of music I had never listened to. Despite my loneliness, I found that the music kept me company quite well. I found myself trying to understand the deeper meaning of some songs.

Eventually, I also wanted to write a song like that. I knew I could do it, but my current state of mind was crying out for vengeance.

"Are you okay?" Ashton asked me once when he found me crying.

"Sure. Just found myself crying because these past months have been incredible," I lied.

"It is okay to cry about it. Hug?"

I accepted, allowing myself to be comforted for a lie. Once his arms wrapped around me, I didn't want to let go. But I had to. He held on longer, and I had to tell him to let go of me.

After that, we had a show that night and played a song we had written, produced and released a week before called 'Sense.'

I had channeled my anger into the somg when I wrote the chorus with Luke. He said that the song felt perfect with me singing the second verse with them, and the chorus.

The fans loved it, and there had been more than one million downloads worldwide. The guys were excited. I loved their enthusiasm. Well, I did until they started tweeting gifs of me being funny.

[a]5SOS: [a]Real_Sabrina_Hearst is really attractive. M x

[a]5SOS: [a]Real_Sabrina_Hearst that moment when you hear Sabrina singing and you run out to watch her... L xx

[a]5SOS: Our opening act is our insanely attractive guest performer #HearstInAU Sabrina Hearst!

[a]5SOS: Ash here- I have a crush on Sabby. [a]Real_Sabrina_Hearst go out with me. xx

Sometimes I found it funny, but at othr times, I felt completely creeped out. One morning, I woke up to Ash and Luke trying to peep into my room!

Calum was more civil. Still silly though. He wrote me a stupid letter and left it in my dressing room. I laughed the entire night before penning a reply message to him.

Sorry sweetie, I love romance but I am more than four years older than you-Sabby.

Michael once asked me if I saw myself dating an australian during the tour. I told him I was too busy to think of romance.