The Stages of Heartbreak and Grief of Who I Once Was

sixteen: i remember (tw)

i still remember
the feeling of your hands upon my skin
forever tainted with your touch
i remember saying
"no"
over and over again until i froze
frozen in once place
unable to fight
eyes closed
wishing it could be over
but i still remember
the feeling of your touch
as you told me,
"i knew you wanted it"
little did you realize
it was easier to pretend to be
the actress in a horror film
then allow myself to fight
without success
i still remember pushing away
the hands that grabbed onto me
and held me without a sense of love
as months
and years pass
in the blink of eye
i still see your hands
painted onto my pale skin
i am now a mural
of your hatred and darkness
that no soap could wash off
you may have forgotten
but i still remember