Cry For Me

Chapter 33

Numbness.

That was what Andrea had been feeling for a long time. She could hear voices, but she couldn’t put faces to them. There was pain in places she had never experienced it in, and her head felt heavier than usual. No matter how hard she tried to move, her limbs couldn’t, better yet wouldn’t comply. It was like there now existed a rift between her spirit and body, a gap that she was trying so hard to overcome.

She wasn’t aware of how time worked in this void she was stuck in but when she was energized to fought hard to at least twitch or make some kind of movement. Andrea had always been used to being mobile, to being up and about doing all sort of things but now she couldn’t even blink. She had so many unanswered questions but for now her main objective was to move. And hell, she was finally able to do so after a lot of effort.

The light was nearly blinding as she struggled to open her eye lids. With her face contorted, she weakly raised one hand to shield herself from the white light, until her blurry vision adjusted to her surroundings. She wasn’t at all surprised to find herself in a hospital, with tubes stuck into her arm and donning a hideous hospital gown. The moments before the accident came rushing back to her like a flood, and then realization dawned on her; she was pregnant but now she couldn’t feel the bulge she had become familiar with.

“W-where…w-,” she tried to speak but her throat was dry. Before she could sit up straight, her mother and a nurse were by her side, preventing her from moving too much.

“Andrea, amor, please don’t move so much. You’re still healing from all the injuries,” her mother’s soothing voice sounded, and Dolores patted her head with much affection. “I’m so glad that you’re awake. I missed you so much, hija.”

The nurse held a glass of water to her lips, and she took a huge sip from it. Not as parched as before she took in a deep breath. “Where is my baby?” she asked boldly, her voice a little shaky though.

Dolores shared a look with the nurse, who subsequently excused herself to inform the doctor about the patient’s awakening. Stepping back from the bed, Dolores went over to the window and sighed wistfully. Before she knew it, a lone tear slipped out of her eyelid, and she quickly swiped it away. That was when Andrea knew that the worst-case scenario had taken its cause. “The baby didn’t make it, did it?” she stated rather than inquired.

Her mother nodded. “You bled so much and the trauma that the little girl endured… they tried to save her and you but by the time Omar found you, it was already too late. Lo siento,” she sniffed, wiping away more stray tears.

And for a moment there, Andrea forgot how to breathe. It was a girl? I was going to have a daughter. That was not the way she’d intended to find out about the gender of her baby but fate her played her a cruel hand. It was like her entire world was spinning; until it all came crashing down.

When her lungs threatened to implode, she gasped out loud and blinked away the black dots that were forming in the corner of her eyes. The tears sprang to her eyes on impulse and before she knew it, she was sobbing hard despite the pain in her ribs. “S-she deserved to live,” she hiccupped in agony. Her mother rushed once more to her side and cradled her in her arms, feeling deep sympathy and empathy towards her daughter.

“I know, amor. I understand the pain you’re feeling and all the emotions you’re experiencing. I too know what it is like to lose a child,” her mother trailed off sadly. “Before Ximena was born, I was pregnant with who would have been your older brother but due to many complications, we lost him before I was in my second trimester.”

Dolores had never told anyone about that story because it brought immense grief to her heart every time she thought about her deceased son. Emilio too had been devasted when it happened and together, they’d made a vow to never let their children know about it, but in this case, she made an exception. She wanted her daughter to know that even though she thought nobody understood what she was going through, her mother could relate and help her overcome it.