Admiring Love

I love you Kushi  spoke directly looking into Arnav's eyes

Arnav's POV

Suddenly I felt a jolt running through my body, hearing her words. Her eyes were so sincere and filled with an emotion that I cannot decipher. They were trying to tell me something but I am not able to understand.

End of POV

Unknown to him a frown appeared on his forehead as he cannot decipher the deep emotions in her eyes

Kushi's POV

Finally I was able to tell him the words of my heart. I never expected that I could stand this close to him and express my love to him.seeing the frown on his face immediately I understood that I am not so fortunate enough to have my love reciprocated. It instantly made me to break the eye lock feeling dejected.

End of POV

Though she felt dejected by looking at the deep frown on Arnav's face, she got her positivity back by thinking that atleast she got the opportunity to express her love to the man he loved, no still loving so madly. This thought made her mood happy instantly.

Here the frown on Arnav's face got much more deeper seeing varying emotions in her eyes. From adoration to sad to happiness. Don't know why but today his heart is telling him that there is much more to what she is showing and telling to him. It piqued his interest to suddenly know what exactly is happening with her, with him mostly to both of them.

Seeing his frown become deeper kushi decided to lighten the atmosphere

These are the words I always wanted to tell him but I couldn't dare to go infront of him. Thanks to you atleast I had this opportunity to express my love freely.

This made Arnav upset/ angry. He himself couldn't decipher what's the emotion he is going through. Why he is feeling upset knowing Kushis love interest? Why he doesn't want her to say these words to anyone? Why is he feeling as if he is the only one who she should be expressing those words to? How much he is controlling the urge to hide her from this whole world so that she could never find her love interest again so that she will just stay with him.

Unable to understand his own changed feelings for Kushi, he quickly left the room.

Seeing him leave without saying anything she sighed. I wish I can tell you those three magical words to you directly Arnav without any pretense or trying to hide my deep love for you. But I am just happy to be with you even as a friend. She encouraged herself

After that both Arnav and Kushi stayed silent. They were busy with their own thought process. Soon it was night and they retired to their room. Both were just lying on the bed deeply immersed in their own thoughts.

Out of no where Arnav asked the question which is bothering him the most

Don't you feel bad that your love never got reciprocated? I felt a lot of hurt when Ammu left me. She didn't even let me fight for our love. She suddenly decided that her parents will never approve our relationship. So it's better we move on in our lives as if nothing happened. I tried, I wanted to speak or even fight with her parents but she didn't put any effort to even try. With in a month she got married to someone her parents chose for her.

2 years Kushi, we were in love for 2 years and she left suddenly as if I am nothing to her. Doesn't she know that her parents wouldn't approve our relationship in the starting only? Then why wait for 2 years? Better if she had told me in the beginning only atleast I would have saved from this heart break na.

More than anything I feel bad that I allowed her to play with my emotions. I feel guilty because of my own fucked up emotions I am not able to give the life you deserve as my wife. What's my mistake in all this Kushi? Why she have to play with my emotions like this? Why did I give or still giving her the right to dictate my heart and life? Why can't I forget the betrayal and move on in my life happily?

Sometimes I feel like I did a grave mistake by falling in love. I should have stayed away from this bloody feeling. Then I wouldn't have been suffering like this nor I would be making you and maa suffer because of me.

Though Arnav thought of asking Kushi about her own feelings, he ended up sharing his own agony instead.

Feeling his misery, kushi just moved closer to console him. He wrapped her arm gently around him still in the lying position.

Arnav, one can never predict when to fall in love with whom to fall in love. It always happens without our interference. Once it happens it depends on the couple to fight for it and stay together inspite of all odds or just bid their byes and go on with their lives.

Some people get so lucky and without any much hindrances they get their love. Some people inspite of fighting their whole life they cannot have their love. Some people don't even put any effort to be with their love ones.

Whatever the decision of the couples might be or what ever the outcome might be we cannot blame love for it. The feeling of being in love is so beautiful. The feelings you go
Through while being in love cannot be compared to anything.

The emotions, the butterflies in the stomach, the nervousness, ready to do anything for the sake of small smile on our loved ones, why so much , just the feeling that we are also capable of loving someone  truly and unconditionally without any expectations - doesn't all these make you happy

Don't think of the outcome Arnav, just think of the phase. I am sure you would have so many sweet memories. Just think of them. Just feel the love Arnav. The feeling of loving someone or being loved by someone is so admiring. It's that admiring love you have to love. All the emotions that evoke in you, all the happiness that gives you.

That's why it never bothered me whether my love got reciprocated or not. Because I am happy with the feeling of being in love and all the different feelings I go through because of being in love

Saying this she tightened her hug

Her sudden action of this made him break his reverie and look directly into her eyes. He could find nothing but deep concern and deep sincerity for him in her eyes. This made him to take her into a bone crushing hug.

Thank you Kushi for always being there for me. Though it's only a few days since I know you, you always gave me warmth to me. You are always sincere with your emotions. You never faked one to just get into my good books. Thank you especially for not mocking or sympathize for my situation. It always a pure concern. And thank you for making me understand what real love is.

Saying this he gently gave a forehead kiss in a friendly manner and went to sleep being in each others arms.