SHATTERING LIFE | Anthony Lockwood | Lockwood and Co

7. The Pain of Loss

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I wonder if I'm being real
Do I speak my truth or do I filter how I feel?

– Wonder (Shawn Mendes)

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Warmed by the hot tea, Lockwood and I stepped into the London streets side by side. When I took a secret look at him, his steps were confident and his arm rested on the hilt of the rapier. However, in comparison to him, I wasn't so well-dressed and I didn't have a weapon of my own either. I could only guess what we looked like from afar.

To our luck, the weather was sunny so I pulled up my jacket sleeves. Underneath it I had my favourite warm sweater which made me almost regret my outfit of choice for today.

Lockwood led us to a shop which was also our first stop. Satchell's offered various salt bombs and other defences against ghosts for agents. Lockwood also used the opportunity to test me once again and ask me more about what a ghost hunter should have in their kit. After that he showed me his favourite brands of bombs, chains or iron fillings.

At last, we were done with shopping and we finally headed home to get some rest. Though, the highlight of the day for me was when Lockwood proclaimed that I would be joining them on a mission tomorrow. I was nervous indeed but it was my opportunity to test out my skills.

As we were walking on Portland Row, Lockwood carried the bags because he insisted even though I offered my help. Finally, we reached the stairs when I spotted an all too familiar face.

"Star!" I exclaimed excitedly, automatically ducking down to pet her. "You found me!"

I couldn't stop the wide smile from forming on my lips as Star snuggled closer to me.

"You know this cat," Lockwood stated, struck by my reaction. When I glanced at him, I noticed the shocked expression and I laughed shortly. His face was priceless.

"I used to always feed her," I started explaining. "I met her first after an argument with my parents. I ran out in the middle of the night, sat down on the pavement when all of a sudden this beauty showed up by my side." I looked down and as if sensing my feelings, Star came closer, leaning her body against mine. "As if she could understand me. As if she wanted to comfort me. And when I looked up, there were so many stars – a rare sight for the city. And I automatically named her Star."

My eyes moved to find Lockwood's. He was staring at me with wonder. Quickly, I looked away in an attempt to hide away my blush but my hair was in a braid which was not helping my case at all. I made a side note for myself: don't braid your hair in Anthony Lockwood's presence.

To distract myself, I reached for my pocket and pulled out a small snack, giving it to Star who happily ate it.

"I always carry a snack with me. Just in case." After a couple of seconds of silence – and enough time for my face to return to its normal colour – I looked back at Lockwood. "I hope I didn't bore you to death."