Arrangement [H.S]

20

My thoughts were a tangled mess. The turmoil inside me was undeniable. I couldn't help but wonder why I had allowed myself to succumb to Harry's allure so swiftly, especially after the intense anger that had coursed through me just moments ago. It was as if my emotions had taken an unexpected detour, leaving me feeling disoriented and uncertain about my own desires.

A heavy sense of guilt weighed on me. I couldn't shake the feeling that I had let Aaron down by not properly addressing his condition and allowing Harry to intervene. It nagged at my conscience that I hadn't insisted on checking in with him or expressing my gratitude for the date in person.

I should probably text him or call him to see if he's okay.

The quick walk to the car was filled with an uncomfortable silence. Neither of us seemed willing to break the ice, as if the weight of unspoken words hung heavily in the air. I couldn't deny that part of me was relieved not to be facing this journey alone, especially at this late hour. Despite my mixed feelings about Harry, his presence offered some sense of security in the midst of the night.

Harry wordlessly opened the car door for me, and I slid into the passenger seat. Harry got into the driver's side in a moment. Without thinking and out of exhaustion, I leaned my head against the car window.

I felt Harry reach behind my head and buckle my seat belt for me. I opened my eyes and he was looking straight at me as he fastened his seatbelt.

I sat there in the passenger seat, my heart pounding, acutely aware of the uncomfortable silence enveloping us. I knew the ride would be short, merely a five-minute journey.

Harry's eyes had finally left mine, and he awkwardly cleared his throat, signaling his intent to break the stifling quiet. As he started the car's engine, the rumbling sound seemed to provide some respite from the unspoken tension that lingered between us.

I couldn't stand the awkward silence any longer, so I reached out and switched on the car radio. The familiar melody of "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" filled the car's interior. The song was already halfway through, so Harry had no choice but to listen to it while driving to the apartment. I found it surprising that he'd listen to such songs, but then again, I had no idea what kind of music he liked.

With a sigh, I decided that it was time to address the elephant in the room, or in this case, the car. I didn't like leaving things unspoken and the lack of communication was eating away at me.

I began the dialogue cautiously, my voice barely above a whisper, "You know, if you wanted to apologize, you could have just said sorry. You didn't have to go and... get under my underwear." I attempted to lighten the mood with a touch of humor, but the tension still hung in the air.

Harry seemed caught off guard by my comment, and for a moment, he didn't know how to respond. He finally broke the silence, his voice carrying a hint of playfulness, "I thought you might've enjoyed it more."

I turned to Harry and began speaking softly but earnestly, "You know, I don't want us to argue all the time. Life is so much better when you can live in peace." My words were genuine, and I hoped they would convey my desire for a more harmonious coexistence.

Harry seemed genuinely puzzled and responded with a touch of confusion in his voice, "I... I don't even know what you want from me, Naomi." His words didn't carry anger but rather a sense of bewilderment and uncertainty.

I sighed, realizing that I needed to be more explicit about my expectations. "Harry, I just told you what I want from you. I'm not asking us to be best friends or anything. I just want us to be able to coexist peacefully." I glanced at him, hoping he'd understand that it wasn't too much to ask. "If you don't like something, tell me, don't be angry and leave and cut off the conversation. It's really frustrating. Together, we can at least try to find a middle ground and an understanding. I know that we will probably shout at each other more than once, but when it happens almost every day, it makes life more miserable."