Chapter 5: Voice

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I stare at the floor trying to comprehend what just happened

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I stare at the floor trying to comprehend what just happened.

I stare at the floor as my shirt lays there, i look at my pants as their is a wet patch and they are undone.

I can feel her, i can smell her.

The door opens again and i gasp until i realise it's my friends.

They come into the room and crowd on the bed as they all talk and laugh.

I'm trapped in my screaming head.

I need to tell someone now before it's too late. I need to tell someone now while i have a chance for someone to believe me.

"H-hey, can i talk to you guys about something?" I ask.

They all go silent and nod looking at me.

"M-mary, she came in, and we h-had s-sex, i-i didn't want it." I say.

I need to tell someone now.

They all smile and high-five, "Yes! You finally got her." My friend Alec says.

I shake my head, "It wasn't like that."

"Nah bro, you're tripping. You fucked the hottest girl in school!"

"Yeah man, you should be excited! This is amazing!"

I nod, "Yeah," I whisper.

~~

"Henry."

I look up as Arlo and everyone else is looking at me.

Oh god.

I begin to shake and shiver, unable to not feel her hands on my body.

"Hey, shhh, what's wrong?" Nellie placed her hand on my back.

I flinch which makes her startle but now move her hand.

I feel the touch of Nellie, slowly sinking against the feeling of it.

I've never felt a touch so gentle, a touch so delicate.

I've never felt so safe under someone's touch.

She slowly runs her hand up and down my back, i think she's trying to soothe me.

"What's wrong?" Arlo asks.

"Nothing." I whisper, my voice barely coming out.

I can feel them all judging me, i can feel their stares, i can feel their hate to me.

"Excuse me." I say and get up leaving.

Tears sink into my eyes and i grab my phone out of my pocket and go into an empty classroom, calling my mum.

"Love, why are you calling at school?" My mum's business voice fills my ears. Not her calm, sweet one i'm so used too.

I slide down against the wall as tears run down my cheeks and my body shakes.

"Henry?" And that's when her voice drops to normal.

"Mumma." I sob.

"What's wrong, honey? What's wrong?" Panic melts to her voice.

"I'm remembering it, mumma, i can feel her." I cry covering my mouth with my hand as i begin to sob uncontrollably.

"Do you need me to pick you up?"

I'm burdening her.

I stifle the noises coming out my mouth, "No, no mum. I'm okay."

"Are you sure? I can come now?"

"No. The days nearly over. I'll be okay." I lie.

"Okay, call me if you need, honey."

I hang up the phone and i pull my knees to my chest and sob against my knees.

She crawled into my lap and began to kiss me.

I almost scream as i tug at my hair trying to forget the memories i've tried so hard not too remember.

"Shut up, shut up, be quiet."

I bite my knees trying not to make a noise.

She begins to undo my pants.

She begins to undo my pants

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my poor boy

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