The Lord of the Rings: An unlikely Reincarnation

-Chapter 11 Hobbit-

-POV Maira-

Your narrative effectively describes the intense situation as the characters attempt to escape the approaching danger. The tension and action are well portrayed. Here's a revised version with some grammar improvements:

We are now packing everything we need, and we hear Smaug approaching. I say, "We need to leave now! Get your things, help Kilí, and then go!" Tauriel agrees, saying, "I agree. We have no time. We must leave!" Bofur goes to Kilí with Filí and says, "Get him up." Filí adds, "Come on, brother." Bofur then again says, "Come on, come on! Let's go."

We are walking to a small boat at the water end of the house. Bain, the son of Bard, says, "We're not leaving. Not without our father!" Tauriel looks at him and says, "If you stay here, your sisters will die. Is that what your father would want?" He shakes his head.

We are now at the back of the house. Filí steps into the boat and holds his hand out to Kilí, saying, "Give me your hand." Bofur adds, "Come on, we gotta go." Tauriel says, "Quickly now! Hurry!" Then while Filí says, "Kili, come on!" Tauriel asks me, "Is this armor not too heavy? Will it slow us down?" I answer her, waving my hand, "No, it won't slow us down. I put enchantments on it. It is now practically as light as a feather." Tauriel nods.

We set off on the canal, poling the boat through the canal. We see Smaug flying overhead. He flies high away from the city before turning around and descending, spewing fire in a straight line through the city. I growl, "I hate dragons. They don't serve a purpose; the only thing they do is destroy and hoard gold." Tauriel looks at me in worry and asks, "Is everything okay?" I respond sarcastically, "Yes, everything is good. It's not like we are just being attacked by a flying lizard that spews fire." She deadpans and looks back upfront.

Then I see a big boat loaded with gold. On it stands what looks like the master of the town, with his right-hand man and some soldiers. Then I see that our boats are on a collision course. I yell, "Watch out!" We hit the boat, and some gold falls from it. The master tells his guards, "Move it! Move it! Come on, faster!" Then he sees the gold falling into the water, and he yells, "My gold, my GOLD!" I roll my eyes at that, thinking, "What a despicable person. If he survives the fire, I will kill him myself." Tauriel looks at me with worry and says, "We can't just do that. The people will decide what to do." I sigh and nod; she is right. I don't have the right to control who lives or dies, not anymore.

We continue, and then I see a cloth falling from above. Looking up, I see a prison cell with Bard inside. The cloth lands around the master's throat. The guard at the front hasn't seen this and says, "Faster! Faster!" The boat picks up speed, and as this is happening, the master is pulled back and eventually gets stuck at the rear post of the boat, getting strangled in the process. I grin at him; eventually, the pressure is too much, and the wall of the prison cell flies out.

The boat of the master continues. I look up and see Bard going to the armory, taking his bow and arrow. I smile, thinking, "Such a brave soul." Then I frown, realizing that he will fail without something to pierce the dragon's armor. I watch him running across the city and climbing up the clock tower. He starts shooting arrows at the beast, but all they do is bounce off the armor of Smaug. Just then, everyone else sees where I am looking, and they see Bard shooting his arrows. The children yell, "Da!" I think, "Oh, these poor children." As Bard fires another arrow, it hits again, but it too bounces off. Kilí yells, "He hit it! He hit the dragon!" Tauriel says, "No..." Kilí retorts, "He did! He hit his mark, I saw!" But Tauriel shakes her head, saying, "His arrows cannot pierce its hide; I fear nothing will." I lower my head in shame, feeling so helpless, even as a god. It's just sad. I set myself in a cross-legged sitting position and start to concentrate, closing my eyes and opening my palm upwards.