Cariño

Chapter 22

- Wyatt Housely -

It's been over a week since I heard from her. She missed a few days of school and came back a couple of days ago. I've never felt worse. I kept pressuring her and she gave in. She wasn't ready for sex and I didn't realize it. 

I could've taken it slow. I didn't though. I hated seeing her like that. She was crying, and shaking, and she couldn't breathe. I was so fucking scared.

I blame myself for it. I didn't think enough about it. Sex isn't to be played with.

She hasn't reached out and I figured I'd give her that space. I texted to check in, but I've been left on read for the whole week. 

I didn't tell Colton what happened. He'd hate me.

I was about to start bawling like a fucking baby right now. I messed up. 

She even asked her mom to start picking her up again.

I'd won over the girl of my dreams and given it all away. I had to go to soccer though. I didn't have a choice. My dad was paying money for me to go. 

I got in my car as sad as I was and ran my heart out. I'd had a bad practice. I kept falling into a daze trying to work on shooting drills.

She didn't even acknowledge me in House Band today. Carson checked up on me. I didn't get anything done at practice. Not a single goal, I didn't even get good passes. I couldn't dribble and do any footwork. 

She did throw off my whole routine. After practice, I went to my car. I rushed to get there, I just wanted to sleep and not think of her.

I started my car and began to choose a playlist. I was fucking sad right now. So it was Faye Webster for me.

As I picked a song I got a text. "I think we need a break right now. I need some space, just to figure myself out," It said.

I looked at her contact, "Cariño." 

Did she just break up with me? 

It took a second to process. Did she just, dump me?

Fuck. 

I started laughing. I don't know why. I just did. I couldn't fucking believe it. I fucked up that bad. 

The laughter turned into tears. I wasn't gonna cry over some girl. 

But it wasn't some girl. She makes me so fucking happy. 

I don't even know anymore.

- Jesse Hayes -

I didn't want to take a break but I needed to understand and come to terms with my struggles first. I had to do that on my own. 

Taking a break was far better than breaking up. I don't think I could ever bring myself to break up with him. It'd have to be far more serious, and if anything I'm at fault for the current situation. 

I genuinely got sick after coming home that day. I went home and started throwing up. I don't know what came over me. I was fine for the first time in a long time.

It was like shock therapy. I'd set it in my mind, that what happened is atrocious. It wasn't my fault. I was just there and abused by Tiana.

I hate her. I mean hate when I say it. I fucking hate her. If I wasn't sacrificing my entire future by dealing with her I'd do everything in my power to kill her. I want her dead. She doesn't deserve oxygen.

She can fucking die tomorrow, and I'd be tap dancing on her grave. 

But I don't think I can just rush into sex like that again because I want to appease him. I really do like him, however, I can't risk my own comfort like that. Next time we do it, it'll be on both of our terms because that's what I intend to do.