Broken at the seams

Everyone knows

Johnnie's pov:

Jake and Tara just left to go back to our house to get some filing equipment for our stream today. Y/n is getting ready still. I get up from the kitchen and walk over to y/ns bedroom door.

*knock knock*

    She opens the door with a big smile. She is so cute even when she doesn't try.

"So beautiful " I say walking into her room sitting on her bed.

"Thank you Johnnie" she says sitting next to me.

She's wearing a t shirt and just her underwear. She must be very comfortable with me doing that. I was kind of in a shock.

"We are going to be streaming today want to join?" I ask her hoping she would.

"That is so scary but yes I don't mind"

"It will be okay I'll be there too" I say putting my arm around her.

Jake and I make videos for our YouTube quite often and stream a lot as well but y/n has only been in one other stream with us. With her post she made on instagram she had gained a bit of followers from that. She had a decent amount before but just associating with us she had gained 6,000 more people.

A lot of the comments On her post was questioning the picture of us together, especially after I made the comment I did. I dont necessarily care what people think about that there will definitely be more to come.

I look over to her and she's just looking at me she hasn't taken her eyes off of me since I can in. I lean in to kiss her on the lips.

"What is it?" I ask her pulling away from the kiss

"None of this feels real" she says and picking up where she just left off

"Like a little over a month ago I was in a town where no one liked me, the only people who supported me was online especially my followers, and now I'm here make some very great friends and met you" she says trailing that last part off a bit as she puts her hand on mine.

"I'm glad you are in a better place now physically and mentally"

I really need to put my feelings out about us I'm so nervous but I think right now would be the best time.

"Y/n can we have a talk" I say looking down

"Of course anytime" she says with such a sweet voice.

" I need to tell you my feelings... about us"

"Okay go on then" she says keeping her full attention on me. I hold her hands and turn to her more.

" I really want to be with you, I want you mine, I want to be there for you for as long as I can. Since meeting you my mind has been so much clearer from the past. But I do have some worries and I think it would be best if we can just talk about them and clear things up." I say feeling like I've said too much.

What if she isn't on the same page as I am.

"Johnnie I really want to be with you too. Even if we are not together I'm going to be here for you as long as I can. tell me what your worries are?"

" as you know I was cheated on"

"Mhm" she hummed

" I'm so stuck with that even happening. I'm scared of putting my whole self into another Person the way I did before and having myself shattered again. Because if I'm being honest I dont know if I could do it again"

"That is very understandable hun, I know that I can say that would never happen but me just saying that isn't going to change what has happened to you and the constant fear, but I can promise you as long as if your ever feeling down about something or overthinking at all talk about it to me I promise on my whole life Johnnie I'll never be mad that you would get insecure we can just communicate and help each other though any problems we may have mentally" she says very seriously.