Defying All Odds #Wattys2015

Chapter Thirteen

After I was released from the hospital, James and I spent almost every waking minute together. Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months. It had been exactly 4 months since that horrifying night. I felt like, for once, I was wanted. James has taken me on multiple dates and each one ends up being sweeter than the last. Currently, we are at the movies to see Jurassic World.

I slipped my hand in his as we stand in line at the concessions. He smiles down at me and I lean my head against his arm. Against my better judgment, I'm falling hard for him, and there's nothing I can do about it. If I stop now, I'll end up hurting myself and it's best if I stay as happy as possible.

Before leaving the hospital, the doctor gave me the most impossible news. He has deduced that I'll have, at most, 6 months to live with as fast as the cancer is progressing. Four of which have passed. I'm terrified, terrified that after I leave, everyone will hate me.

I sighed before lifting my head and looking up at James. Despite everything that happened when I was a teenager, I was still a virgin and there was one thing on my bucket list that I wanted done. Don't die a virgin. I sighed again before shaking my head. No way. I won't do that to him.

I hear James chuckle, pulling me out of my reverie. "What's wrong, darling? It was your idea to see this movie." He asks, brushing a strand of hair out of my face. I smile sadly. "I was just thinking. About...you know..." I look down, knowing how much he hates when I talk about the two months we have left together. He sighs before pressing a gentle kiss to the top of my head and starts tugging on my hand. "C'mon. I'm not up for a movie." He pulls me outside and to his car, where he opens the passenger door for me to climb in. I smile and slide in. He slides into the other side and starts the car before backing out and heading towards his home.

As we pull into the street, I start fidgeting. I know that I need to do this, but God, how do you seduce your boyfriend when you're only going to live for two more months? I suck it up and decide that tonight, I will complete the one thing I have left on my bucket list.

He pulls me inside and asks if I would like something to drink. I nod and sit down on the couch, getting even more nervous as it takes longer for him to come back. He walks in and sits the cups on the coffee table before sitting next to me and grabbing my hand. "Ev, you know you can talk to me, right? You don't have to keep everything bottled up. I want nothing more than to know what is going through that pretty little head of yours." He tells me, instantly confirming that I absolutely have to do this right that moment.

I take a deep breath before uttering the words that can change everything. "James, I want you to make love to me." I say, right as he takes a long drink from his cup. He chokes and starts coughing. I instantly regret it. He obviously doesn't want me that way. I stand abruptly and reach for my back. "I...I..." I stop and take a deep breath before continuing. "I'm sorry... That was wrong of me... I should go home." I mumble before turning to the door. I'm stopped by a hand on my wrist.

"Wait. Don't go, Evelyn." James says, standing up and pulling me to him. I look at the ground, terrified to look up at him. "Evelyn, look at me." I instantly look up and the emotions I see in his eyes cause my head to spin. "I would very much like to make love to you, sweetheart. I just want to make sure that you are completely sure that this is what you want. I-" "I do, Jem. I want you." I interrupt him and he smiles wide before leaning down to press his lips against mine.

My arms slip around his neck and my fingers slide into his hair. James slips his arms around my back and his hands go under the hem of my top, pressing against the skin on my back. I pull back slightly and look up at him. He smiles and slides his hands down my back and grip my thighs. He tightens his hold and lifts me, carrying me to his bedroom.

~~

I sink to the floor of my bathroom and grip my hair in my hands. This can't be happening. I start freaking out. This wasn't supposed to happen. He's going to hate me. I take a deep breath and stand up. "Kathryn! Isabelle!" I call, walking out of my bathroom. The rush into my room and sit on the bed. "They were positive. All 4 of them." I whisper, pacing back and forth. I start crying.

Kathryn stands up and wraps her arms around me, whispering that I have to tell him. That he has to know. I shake my head and pull away, mumbling about doctors and such. I decide that I'm not going to tell him. Not yet.