Life in Fae Valley

A Small Break: The Letter

As Christmas and New Years approaches, things in life pick up. Everyone knows this.

I kinda... Neglected this baby for a bit. Life got busy. Got sick, took a social media break, ended up in hospital, end of year exams.

But!! I can promise this. Life In Fae Valley will return within the New Year. For now, I might publish small AU writing pieces here of my story till I get back in the writing mood.

As you can see within the title, this addresses one of two things. The small storyline hiatus that the story will be taking, then as well it addresses the AU piece I will be writing today.

In this AU, it's a very much hypothetical... But, hypothetically, what if Natalie lost the battle of her own issues? What if the dark magic surrounding that little farm house consumed her, and never let her out again?...

Lets find out.

The  Letter.

22/05
Clover Road
Leroy Farm
Fae Valley
9745

Dear Natalie

I'm not even really sure if you're gonna get this letter... Hell, what am I saying? You're dead. I can only hope that when I burn this letter, it'll go up go you where you can read it...

It's been years, hasn't it? I'd be lying if I said I didn't count the days.

Feels weird to think about. You were 29 and I was 32 when we met... You left me when you were 35. I was 38.

Well, I'm 44 now. That'd make you what... 41 now? Feels insane to think about. Missy and Eddies kids are all grownup now... Your god daughter asks about you a lot. Why you never visit, who you were. Missy doesn't like to talk about it.

The kids still don't really know what happened. Eddie tells them you went on a long walk and never came back. I mean, it's not a full lie... You did walk and never come back. Living, atleast...

We buried you under the family tree. We figured you were as much a Leroy as the rest of us... Chuck and Lucy are expecting their second baby. A girl, I've heard. They wanna name her Natalie, after you.

Insane to think they got hitched before us, don't you think? I'm sorry I was such a coward that I couldn't ask... But you never pressured me. Never questioned what I did, you always supported me through everything... I miss that.

I miss you. So fucking much.

Ziggy's sister in law said I should write this. Said it'd help me process it all... I don't know if it's helping. I wasn't the one who found you, by the way. Chuck did. But I guess you already know that if you're a spirit? That's what the others are trying to convince me. That you're still with me, watching over me... But if you're still with me, why cant I feel you? Why can't I see you, hear your laugh, hold you in my arms.

Therapy is kind of helping. The guy I talk to, his name's Wyatt. Real nice guy. He also encouraged me to write this. To try help me process that grief.

Ziggy's gotten better you know. Got himself a girlfriend. This little chic, think she's from France City. You'd have liked her, she's really sweet.

Makes me wonder who else is up there with you. Ma? Dad? They passed on shortly after you did. Dad fell ill, we think Ma died of heartbreak. I still wonder how you really died, you know. No one knows.

JD is still looking into it, after all these years. Dante reckons it keeps him busy when he's not working. Such an odd crime scene. No prints, no other tracks. Just you, face down in the river, this big ass hole in your forehead. Chuck said it looks like someone had carved a pipe sized hole of your head. Wounds were clean as a whistle. Wasn't a bullet wound, since there was no exit wound and the autopsy didn't find anything in your skull or brain. Wasn't a blade, no serrated edge.  Just... Dead. No sign of a struggle either.

What happened to you, Nat?

Why did you walk off?

Why did you leave me?

I've been in and out of hospital these past few years. First started when I tried to take my own life. That's when Chuck and Lucy put me in therapy. After that, just been health issue after health issue.

Took up smoking after you died, so my lungs are failing me. Hearts not too good anymore either and Chuck says I'm forgetting things much more than I used to.

I wish they had just let me die. Then I could have been with you.

I have to take 5 different medications now daily just to keep me going. One for depression, one for my heart, one for my lungs, two for my memory. Dante reckons I only need the ones for my heart and depression, says he used to take a cocktail of medications like that and it only did him worse. He's not a doctor though, so I still take all my meds every day.

Fords dead too by the way. Shot himself. Dante doesn't tell us why, but I mean, no on really liked him. Mama, Dante and Lucy occasionally go visit his grave. Tell some funny stories about when he was young apparently.

Oh, and I think Missy said Elliot and Lizzie are moving? They settled down here for awhile to take care of Ziggy but now that he's better, they're busy packing up. Gonna move to Germania I think.

It hurts seeing all the new kids in town. Everyone's having babies, everyone's falling in love.

I'm sorry I couldn't give you a baby. I know you really wanted a family of our own and I did too. I know you kept on saying it wasn't my fault, that we should keep on trying.

Still feels like my fault though.

I wonder if things would have been easier if we did have a kid. Little copy of us running around... Probably not. Would just be another reminder of you.  My therapist says ignoring what happened won't make it go away... Fair enough, but it definitely doesn't hurt near as much when I ignore it.

You feel so far away now.

I miss you.

I miss our talks. Your kiss, your touch. You'd always find a way to calm me down. Life was exciting when you were around. Now its just... Dull. Monotonous.

A mind numbing routine every day.

Rover found himself a girlfriend. Remember him? That pup of Champ and Sadie that we kept. His girlfriend is Lucy and Chucks new dog, a labradoodle named Curly Fries.

Rover and Curly Fries make a cute couple. They're very playful around each other and Rover growls at any other dog that gets close to Curly, but I dont think she minds. He's the only male dog she isn't skittish around. Kinda like us but in reverse huh?

This letters getting pretty long now isn't it. I just... I almost dont want it to end. I want to keep on writing and writing and writing in hopes you'd somehow miraculously appear to take my pen and tell me to shut up. But you're not going to, are you?

I can say I miss you a hundred times and cry a hundred times more, but that's not going to bring you back. I just have to accept you're not ever coming back.

And that I'll be alone like this forever.

Well, don't tell the others, but I've made a plan to be with you soon. I'll disappear, just like you did. Hopefully Chuck wont be the one to find me. I don't want him going through that trauma. Not again.

I can't wait to be with you again, my love. I'm counting down the minutes till I'm with you.

I still love you as much as I did the day I met you, Natalie.

I love you.

Hope to see you soon
Forever your man
Brandy.