Sympathy for the Devil (Lucifer, Supernatural)

The Recap

Leila didn't want to be confined to the bunker any longer. Especially when the Winchester brothers were out looking for Lucifer, and Castiel.

She wanted to see him and talk to him.
She needed to see him.

He hadn't really been wrong... She had been more physically attracted to him when he used Nick as a vessel. However, after all that time in the cage, she felt she was attracted to him beyond his corporeal form. That was something she'd finally admitted to herself quietly after speaking to Dean and Sam about the cage.

Her relationship with Nick had possibly been a big influence on her original emotional vulnerability towards Lucifer. Especially when she had been locked in the cage with him. Nick was a familiar face and Leila had needed the safety of familiarity. But, by then, she had also found sympathy for the devil after all the events leading to and after the Apocalypse.

In the cage, Lucifer had retained his appearance as Nick. Sam had said the same from his time in the cage and when he had gone to see Lucifer in Hell before Castiel had consented to being possessed. 

Now, like before when he was possessing Sam, Leila found herself trying to be uncomfortable with the idea interacting with him whilst he inhabited her friend's body out of respect. As a human, it was deeply conflicting to be a witness to the whole vessel thing. It raised questions on identity and physical form that Leila didn't feel up for unpacking just yet.

She hoped that Castiel was being locked in a beautiful memory. She missed him and missed having someone she could tell her thoughts and problems too with less judgement than what Sam and Dean tended to rapidly fire at her. She knew that Sam and Dean missed Castiel too. They hid it much better than she did.

After the apocalypse fight between Lucifer and Michael years before, Leila had found Nick's body in Detroit and prayed to Castiel. She needed the angel's assistance in bringing Nick's body back to lay rest with his family in Delaware. However, by the time she had gone to let Castiel through the angel warded door, Nick's body was gone. Taken.
Leila had told Lucifer this whilst they were in the cage. He was clueless and wondered if it was his loyalists trying to maintain the vessel for his return or if someone craved a cadaver for the hell of it – the latter of which made Leila's heart drop. Lucifer had grinned at her ashen expression.
Would he ever be truly good? Could he ever really care for her?

After that apocalypse fight in 2010, she had been bitter for months. It led her to work on more and more cases with Bobby, or by herself, to distract from her guilt about Nick. She ended up living the life of the hunter after all, with a biochemistry degree she would access the knowledge from for the occasional hunt or home baking scenarios – much to the ever-hungry Winchesters' delight. She had lived with Bobby, often joined by Sam and Dean, and dealt with a new host of supernatural beings.

After a few months of terror from Sam's soulless self, Sam came back from the cage. Seeing him so agonized and disrupted from being around Lucifer had broken Leila. She felt herself becoming completely disengaged from her previous sympathies for Lucifer. It had taken a long time before Sam had healed. Castiel had eventually healed him and it had been one of his greatest sacrifices. Leila then had to watch her friend struggle and suffer like Sam had.

Not long after that, Castiel had become poisoned by power through dark powerful souls and proclaiming himself God. Leila had stupidly brought it upon herself to fight him, hoping that he would see his friend in front of him and stop. Instead, he had presented himself in a menacing glowing state and blasted her till she thought she had died – In hindsight, she probably did die.

It had felt like she was falling through the air in slow-motion for hours.
She saw red, then black, then she felt something awful and cold slithering around her veins and then she felt nothing at all.
That was when she had found herself, out of all places, in the Cage with Lucifer where they had established a relationship Leila was shocked to find possible.

Now, Lucifer was back on Earth and in Castiel's body, within reach of Leila's secrets, fears, loves, wreaking havoc in a way which would reinforce Sam and Dean's desires to kill him.
Leila hoped Castiel had his strongest guards up in his mind.
Besides, there were bigger problems than emotional secrets now. Amara was unstoppable and Leila was stuck in her violent storm with the Winchesters.