My Horrible Ex-Husband

Chapter Three: A Most Horrible Ride

I despise Eli. I think I actually hated Eli, when we were together. This hate grew stronger after we divorced. The thing that I hate most about Eli is his personality. You’re probably saying how could I have even married someone who had such a shitty personality? Well it’s simple. He had money. Ok - I’m kidding – it wasn’t just the money that drew me to Eli. Believe it or not, he was different, when we first met. He was sweet. But the again that was probably because he desperate to get into my pants. Who knows who the real Eli is?

“Dad,” Michael huffed, walking into my personal office. “How long are Eli and Michelle going to stay with us? Eli has money. Can’t he afford to get a new place?”

“Money is tight right now for Eli,” I explained. “Plus, everything he and Michelle owned beside his car were lost in the fire. So, he has to start everything over from scratch.”

“This sucks,” Michael exclaimed. “Michelle is annoying and Eli  . . . is Eli.”

“Tell me about it,” I said biting my lip. “I mean Eli, of course. I blame him for everything. But don’t be too hard on your sister. I don’t understand her yet but, I will.”

“If you say so,” Michael groaned as he walked out of my room. It was awkward having Eli and Michelle here, mostly Eli. Perhaps there was something that I could do to make it less awkward. Maybe a little family bonding so Michael can become closer to Eli and Michelle. That would be interesting. 

I would suggest the idea to Eli and see what he thought. But I’m sure even if he disagreed which he probably would, I would do it anyways. Eli isn’t the boss of me. 

I walked downstairs in search of Eli. I figured he would be on the couch or something, but he was not. Where the hell was he?

“Eli,” I called out. “Eli! Where are you? I know your home! Your car is outside.”

He didn’t respond. The fucking asshole was doing this on purpose. I know he was. 

“Michelle?” I said walking into her room. “Where is your father?”

“I don’t know and I don’t care,” she retorted. I bit my lip. How could she be so cold when she was on punishment? 

“And you just earned another week,” I replied. I walked out of her room just as she began to protest. Parenting is such an easy job sometimes. I chuckled to myself as I walked down the hall. I stopped midway as I heard the sounds of snoring echo through the hall. It was coming from my room. 

I sucked my teeth as I walked into my bedroom. Eli was in my bed sleeping. I could kill him. Who did he think he was coming into my room and crawling into my bed? 

I crept over to the side of my bed and just stared at him. His mouth was wide open and drool dripped from the corner of his mouth. I was thoroughly disgusted by the sight of him, snoring away. I stuck my finger in his mouth, causing him to jerk awake, coughing violently. I chuckled as he glared at me. 

“I hope you had a great sleep,” I huffed. 

“I was until you came in,” he said rubbing his mouth. “God, you’re so mean.”

“Boo hoo,” I snorted. “You’re sleeping on my gotdamn bed. How did you think I would react?”

“I’m exhausted Caleb,” Eli sighed. “And my back hurts from sleeping on that damn pull out bed for the past week. I thought maybe you would show a little common decency.”

“My common decency went out the window with our marriage,” I retorted. “But anyways, I need to talk to you.”

“Oh, so you want something from me?” Eli asked raising an eyebrow. “And I want something from you. I guess we are at an impasse.”